You a submariner?

Discussion in 'Nautical Jokes' started by skyvet, Jan 5, 2011.

Welcome to the Navy Net aka Rum Ration

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial RN website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. A matelot is out for his Saturday night jig and P.U, and as the evening draws to a close he notices a good looking party sitting all alone. He also notices that she's sat in a wheelchair, and feels sorry for her, and the fact she's been sat there alone all evening. He asks her whether she'd like to dance, and she replied that she wasn't able to get out of the wheelchair, "No problem" said the matelot, "I'll wheel you around in time to the music". This he did, and after the dance was over, he asked how she was getting home. "I'll just wheel myself home as usual" she said. "Let me push you" volunteered our hero, and off they went towards the estate by the dockyard. As they passed the park, she asked him whether he fancied a bit, as she was feeling particularly randy that evening. "Not half" said the matelot, "but how can we with you in your wheelchair?" "Just lift me out" she said, "and hang me by my coat on the park railings". Not being one to disappoint, the matelot did exactly that, and after they'd both been to heaven and back, he gently lifted her back into her wheelchair. "You a submariner?" she asked him. "How did you know that?" he enquired. "Well all those skimmer bastards leave me hanging on the railings!"
  2. :thumright: I was that submariner
  3. Bloody skimmers... :pukel:
  4. Maybe the skimmers left her there to drain?
    • Like Like x 2
  5. I'm pretty sure I may have been one of the bastard skimmers.
  6. :oops::oops::oops: me too
  7. Haha poor lass. Another reason why deeps get paid more.
  8. Apparently submariners do it deeper...and silent. I think I'd prefer a skimmer then just for a little noise appreciation :)

    Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk - now Free
  9. Sick Bastard!
  10. Wots a skimmer?

    Posted from the Navy Net mobile app (Android / iOS)
  11. Surface Navy
  12. It's navy slang for sailors stationed on board surface ships, as opposed to submarines. Opposite of bubbleheads.
    Bubbleheads consider skimmers to be targets that just haven't been sunk yet.

    Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
  13. Wait a mo! I thought bubbleheads were divers and submariners were sun (or soap) dodgers.

    Posted from the Navy Net mobile app (Android / iOS)
  14. Lol there are a few definitions for both...whatever floats your boat really!

    Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
  15. It depends where you hail from I think

    Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
    • Like Like x 1
  16. If you need to ask, you are one ;)
    • Like Like x 2
  17. [​IMG]
    • Like Like x 1
  18. I always lifted her off the railings, but i was too knackered to push home!

    Posted from the Navy Net mobile app (Android / iOS)
  19. If you're going to be like that Billy


    Complete with Goofers on the upper scupper!
    • Like Like x 1

Share This Page