This is a genuine one from mine. "He was under air attack and submarine threat, hot bunking for 2 1/2 months , in condition Z for 2 1/2 months and was within the radius of enemy aircraft for 3 months, and the weather wasn't that good either....."
On a slightly more serious note, I once submitted a S126 (Stores Incomplete or Defective on Receipt) on a baby Tiff. He was a complete waste of oxygen. My boss pushed it up the chain, but eventually it was recycled into a report about the inadequacies aka crapness of basic Tiff training at the time.