Wonderfully unintelligent women

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by cúnto, Jan 2, 2011.

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  1. I was sat with Pa, having a delectable curry when I overheard a particularly vacuous (yet stunningly attractive) lass asking:

    'Oh , what are they called? Like a Giraffe, but with horns'

    Turns out she was talking about a Llama.

    What the cunty fuck?! :D I want her to have my babies, but I never want her to read to them!
     
  2. Blackrat

    Blackrat War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    If she doesn't know the difference between a leg of chicken and a penis, i'll happily take her on a picnic.
     
  3. Sounds like a KFC greasy bucket moment to me :lol:
     
  4. I would suggest a good examination of her nashers first, though. [​IMG]
     
  5. Not when she sprinkles your cock with salt and pepper you won't.
     
  6. Its a little trick we women play.

    Pretend to be thick / stupid only to lure you men into a false sense of superority.

    Then when you're all smug we strike ...........
     
  7. You can't fool me. I know that you can spell properly.
     
  8. What's that slogan again about licking and fingers?
     
  9. Blackrat

    Blackrat War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    You make that sound like a bad thing.
     
  10. Kentucky Freud chicken.It's motherfu**king good? :scratch:
     
  11. There goes another bloke who has never had his cock confused for food by a thicky. Lucky buggers :cry: :oops:
     
  12. I'm another one it hasn't happened to before either.
    Although I do have teeth marks left by a somewhat frisky vegetarian.

    If she was a meat eater I could assume she thought it was a peperarmi........oh no wait a minute :oops:
     
  13. On here you do the first part really well, but usually fail on the follow through. :roll:

    Getting my 'Not sitting on the fence' shots in early this year.
     
  14. My wife said last week in the Arctic weather,
    " you shouldn't leave that can of car windscreen de- icer out in all this cold weather,the frost will ruin it!"
    I've been married to her for 49 years and even that left me speechless.
    Still she's a bloody great cook.
     
  15. I can when I haven't had more than my fair share of the wine and am not watcching Love Actually !
     
  16. Back when I was a stinking civvy I worked as a mountain bike mechanic at Oasis Holiday village in the Lake District. We had reserved parking spaces for us round the back of our building and I noticed a particularly hot young lady parking in one of our spaces.

    I asked her what she was doing as the sign said "Reserved parking" and her reply was:

    "Oh, sorry, I thought it said reversed."

    Thick cunt.

    It also wasn't that long ago that I had to bin another idiotic woman for ordering the Horse's doovers at a restaurant. Imagine my pride in my choice of female when the waitress explained to the stupid, ignorant, uneducated bitch that they were hors d'oeuvres. Despite her outright hotness I couldn't forgive her persistent moronic ramblings.

    Women are thick as fuck.
     
  17. This has fuck all to do with women, but could you nip round and adjust my front brake?
     

  18. I supose you are the type that pronounces "Crudite" Crewdaytay :twisted:
     
  19. An alternative, 'crewdayta'....with built in Thankyou?
     
  20. :D
     

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