Due to recent events at work, our departmetnal Christmas Party has just been cancelled and I've just deferred my planned Christmas UK visit until next summer - if I'm asking my team to be available over Chrimbo, I can't take off - consequently, I'm sure that deep in Northamptonshire there's a voodoo doll with my name on it in the hands of my in-laws and parents.
I shall be celebrating Mithras in my own way this year.
Probably in the garage while the missus and kids entertain in the nice warm house with tinsel, a tree and all the rest of the crap that gets put back in the loft as soon as I can manage it.
B*stards! They all want my money
As a fundamentalist liberal and devour humanist, I reject all Christian idols, including the so-called BVM, the Nativity and , er, Father Christmas, who I understand has never been a man of the cloth. I happily wear mixed fibres, eat shellfish and no not regard any of these things as prohibited (toevah, often mistranslated as 'abonimation') as I am not a Priest, for whom these things are prohibited.
No, he has been taken out of service for a touch up, and to have his bottom scraped.
He is due back when the spring comes, him and his several mates who are anchored off the coast between Barcelona and Tarragona.