When I grow up

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by stan_the_man, Mar 23, 2010.

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  1. When I was a pup I used to want to be a matelot like my big brother I joined and he fcuked off outside and became a tosser. Then I wanted to shag every bint above the age of 16 (12 really but didn't want to get locked up).
    I wanted to kill Ian Brady.
    Now semi retired why do I slow down and ogle every young women I see from my car when I know it's difficult just raising a smile at my age.
    But isn't it just deep joy when you see the tightest arse and the pertiest breast go waltzing by - fcuk me just reversed into a lampost in Torpoint.
  2. With you there Stan, almost lost teeth to lampposts with my neck on a swivel.
    Tis worse in a tourist town as there is young flange everywhere.

    Saw a docu' on Steptoe not so long back when 'Arold came out with his famous line ''You dirty old man''........oh yes. :D
  3. So true Stirling do the neck twist like Exorcist the movie, and all these gorgeous young lasses got fcuking spotty faced geeks with no dress sense and their kecks hanging out their jeans attached to them. Whats wrong with a slicked back bit of Brilcream and and a nice floral shirt with a penny collar.
  4. What am I most looking forward to about joining the RM? No, it's not the coveted green lid or that I'll finally have an excuse to air bum my mates without being called queer. The thing I'm most looking forward to is the times I'll be balls-deep in fourteen-year old minge when the dirty slags find out I'm a Commando.

    Oh fcuking yes! :D
  5. Yes this bloke is gay but he is spot on. Born and raised in Pompey.
  6. Bugger all that, i dont ever wanna grow up
  7. I was banned by Mrs Wrecker from driving down Royal Parade in Guzz one summer when I nearly went into the back of the car in front a couple of times.

    Still like to "casually" bimble round the Hoe and Barbican in the summer.
    Being a perv is a cross between a hobby and a 2nd career :)
  8. Last summer walking along the front at Stokes bay with the missus when walking towards us came 2 young girlies …both topless…
    `I know what youre thinking` says the missus…
    `Should have gone to Specsavers`…

  9. (granny)

    (granny) Book Reviewer

    Had an occasion recently to visit my Dr. I was seen by a new one, she was young, wore a short skirt and had on black patterned stockings. As she manhandled me I came up with a lazy lob. She later tested my blood pressure and said it was a touch high!! I had to escape before I embarrassed myself. I went around smiling all day. So nothing changes ;)) I think I'll have to have a re-test!

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