What's the dirtiest thing you have done in bed?

#5
Waking up with a 10" steaming brown 'Master at Arms' all over my back that was as thick as your wrist and full of nuts!

That'll teach me to drink pints of Tennents Super......
 
#7
RonJeremy said:
Waking up with a 10" steaming brown 'Master at Arms' all over my back that was as thick as your wrist and full of nuts!

That'll teach me to drink pints of Tennents Super......
Pints of Tennents Super.....I've got this 'orrible vision...
 
#8
Had a an hour of wild rampant sex with Miss Ethel Trehaddock
of 101 Acacia Drive, St, Austell on the occasion of her 85th birthday.

Mind you - she'd been dead for three weeks.

Its the thought that counts.
 
#10
BillyNoMates said:
Had a an hour of wild rampant sex with Miss Ethel Trehaddock
of 101 Acacia Drive, St, Austell on the occasion of her 85th birthday.

Mind you - she'd been dead for three weeks.

Its the thought that counts.
So it was you who had my sloppy seconds :lol:
 
#13
BillyNoMates said:
Had a an hour of wild rampant sex with Miss Ethel Trehaddock
of 101 Acacia Drive, St, Austell on the occasion of her 85th birthday.

Mind you - she'd been dead for three weeks.

Its the thought that counts.
I fcuked her mum at that party. 8O
 

Dicky

Lantern Swinger
#14
Got very pissed on cider one night. Crashed out on my bed. Woke up for a piss but couldn't be asrd to go to the loo, so I pissed in the empty cider bottle. Woke up later with a raging thirst. Saw this half bottle of 'cider' and had a mouthful before I realised what it was I'd drunk - yes you've guessed it - COLD PISS......Oh Nooooooooooooooooooooo
 

Achmed

Lantern Swinger
#16
Wasnt quite in bed yet, I picked up this lovely Pi$$ed young lady in Sam's one night, as a Gentleman Bootie, I decided to take her to her place.....after some romancing she started to spew....(student teachers just can't hack it) so not to disturb my lovemaking..I took her into the bathroom, bent her over whilst she was spewing into the bath and continued to shag her sensless, she'd never been shagged by a bootneck before..what a result, I could see myself in the mirror grinning like a [email protected] Jap.

after the foreplay, I put her into bed, then she spewed on me when i was sleeping, i woke up covered in spew, she was covered in spew, so i shat in the bed before she woke up, she rolled over into my shite,and thought she shite herself, she ran into the shower, the bath was covered in spew, she started spewing again...oh how I laughed.
 
#18
Hi Shotgun_assassin,

the dirtiest thing I done (in bed... why only in bed....).... let me think....



IT WAS YOU !!!!

DON'T YOU REMEMBER ME?????

Well, now I am DEEPLY OFFENDED!!!!
I mean the beginning was very promising, but then .... uh


Have a nice Easter .... and a lot of eggs......


:shaking2:


:sign12:


:angel12:
 
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