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What toy medals would you have made

WreckerL

War Hero
Super Moderator
Leading on from Pontius's thread about the medal site got me thinking. I posted that I'd have a "Stuck under the ice for 3 months at a time bored shitless" medal.What have/had you done in service on more than one occasion that would be worthy of a medal?
 

Pontius

War Hero
Can I have a "Didn't die while driving the SHAR" medal. It happened to too many of my mates, so I reckon I can have a crap piece of tin saying so. How about a "Divisional run ashore survivor" medal? Only given to DOs who managed to live through div runs in Pompey, Gib and at least two other UK ports without the Police getting involved. (Edited to add: does anyone else have a Mac and can't seem to use paragraphs or smileys? My 'return' button does its job when I'm writing the message but then it just comes out in one splurge when I hit the 'post' button. My smileys don't seem to want to be clicked at all.....sad face)
 
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MotleyBlue

Badgeman
Wow there is ALOT of "medals" on that website! Out of curiously do any of you ex serving or currently serving guys think any on there (or something very similar) should be real medals?
 

sgtpepperband

War Hero
Book Reviewer
"Like Olympic medals and tennis trophies, all [war medals] signified was that the owner had done something of no benefit to anyone more capably than everyone else." - Joseph Heller, "Catch-22"
 

sgtpepperband

War Hero
Book Reviewer
WANT!!
 

Topstop

War Hero
Can I have a "Didn't die while driving the SHAR" medal. It happened to too many of my mates, so I reckon I can have a crap piece of tin saying so. How about a "Divisional run ashore survivor" medal? Only given to DOs who managed to live through div runs in Pompey, Gib and at least two other UK ports without the Police getting involved. (Edited to add: does anyone else have a Mac and can't seem to use paragraphs or smileys? My 'return' button does its job when I'm writing the message but then it just comes out in one splurge when I hit the 'post' button. My smileys don't seem to want to be clicked at all.....sad face)

Thats not a run a shore thats a quiet night in. The medal should only be issued if you can get all charges dropped.
 

Drakey

War Hero
Messdecks and Flats Resistance Organisation (MAFRO) medal for all the times I've had to do mess chefs and scrub the flats during the middle or morning watch.
 
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Ninja_Stoker

War Hero
Moderator
Messdecks and Flats Resistance Organisation (MAFRO) medal for all the times I've had to do mess chefs and scub the flats during the middle or moring watch.

Agreed.

Reckon the recipients should receive a bar to the medal for each time they had to strip off the ME7 (floor polish) within 24 hours and re-lay it.
 

WreckerL

War Hero
Super Moderator
Ooooh ME7, that brings back memories, shiny fingernails for days afterwards. Funny how stewards used to wink at you though.
 

SONAR-BENDER

War Hero
I survived Global '86 medal ... (Rosette if managed the whole trip - some lightweights went home half way)

Does 5th watch count? 'Cos I flew to UK fom San Fran, but flew back to San Diego - only missing Pearl Harbour (note correct spelling). Managed to get divorced though, so it wasn't all bad.
 

Scran_Bag

War Hero
I believe that I am fully entitled to be awarded and to wear with pride and honour the Most Diligent Order of Shithouse Cleaner and Bar.

If issued, perhaps the ribbon could be made from a strip of an unrolled Vim tube and the medal itself a flattened out cap from a tin of Bluebell. The bar, created from freeze-dried matted pubic hair would of course be stained "naturally" brown and yellow. :pirat:
 

RomanyRanner

Lantern Swinger
Were they four legged with a nice warm wooly coat on ?


Na, 2 legged variety, although I must admit a couple of them were bloody ugly. One was so fat that she had cheese growing in the folds of her skin. I should have gotton a medal for shagging her alone !
 

Blackrat

War Hero
Moderator
Book Reviewer
Out of curiously do any of you ex serving or currently serving guys think any on there (or something very similar) should be real medals?

No. Although i do think that anyone who served over three years (in any of the services) should be entitled to some sort of gong recognising their service.

As for new medals, there should be a "I survived a tour of MPA which is run by a bunch of RAF wankfucks" commissioned.
 

KATWEEZIL

Lantern Swinger
"I survived being lifted off of HMS Spey during a SQUADEX" by Crab Air and having the once-only suit torn when hitting the port funnel and then being dunked in the oggin during the helo transfer. I'd also like a Bar for the fcuking shit gemini transfer back when I refused to be winched back from Helmsdale (I think - I was in god awfull state)

Didn't even get a survivors tot - bastards
 
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