What the fcuk happened???

Well, I got Harry Von turbo crappers last night, I thought Monday was epic but that was ridiculous.

I have a black Port peeper, no shoelace in my starboard mincing bat, a burnhole in my T-shirt and a small 5p size burn on my chest. A bald patch the size of a plaster on my right shin, no money, a cornish Pasty which I have no idea of it's origins.

The last thing I actually remember was telling some dolled up 17 year old upper class horsey type chicks to stop talknig about Harry Potter because Harry Potter is a cnut and fcuks kids, then the Jaeger bombs happened.

Get the fcuk in there! Hooray for Binge drinking on a school night!

 

I did tell you that taloolah would get you mate. Now check your hoop for the big black rubber protruding object!!!

 

Checked, no hoop damage. Always one of the first things I look for when I have a blackout.

 

Havent had one of those in a while mate but this weekend could get uber messy after the trauma of standing in front of 150 people whilst getting hitched!!! 8O 8O

 

Whats this then XRD..... no more loose and fast for you then :roll: as long as monty or jeremy is not there the flower girls should be safe.

Good luck 8)

 

Cheers oppo!! 8) 8)

 

.

 

I did that shit in May.

Top Tip: Make sure you thank the most important person for turning up during your speech, without whom this wonderful day would not be possible, I am of course talking about the barman.

 

Already sorted mate!! :wink:

 

That explains it then, apart from the burn. Could have been a Tazer.

 

You lightweight cnut Monty!

I went for a few quiet ones in 99 and woke up this morning married, 2 kids and my bank account has been raped. How the fcuk did this happen? :angry7:

 

I fcukin warned you about Helensburgh.