We're not coming.

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by witsend, Jul 2, 2009.

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  1. witsend

    witsend War Hero Book Reviewer


    Last edited: Aug 19, 2013
  2. That's a toughie, I hate family feud stuff.

    Bearing in mind it appears to be a semi-snub on their part, yes, I reckon a tactful reply along the lines you suggest would be the most appropriate.
  3. Reply "Once a slapper, always a slapper. A wedding wont make you legitimate".
  4. tiddlyoggy

    tiddlyoggy War Hero Book Reviewer

    When family feuds kick off, I'm glad they're 360 miles away from me! I think soleil's and Guzzler's suggestions are both good. Alternatively, you could go, get crappers, shag a bridesmaid and fill in the groom and/or best man.
  5. Do it properly.

    Mr and Mrs Wits were delighted to receive the invitation to the wedding of Jane Slapper to Mr Jock Slappy on 23 August 2009 in St Someone's Church, and afterwards at The God-Awful Hotel, but unfortunately will be unable to attend.

    Style wins every time.
  6. Well, seeing as you've asked this in Lil's may I suggest something along the lines of "fcuk off you minging crocadillyfuckpig, we wouldn't want to be anywhere near you, you kuntfaced skanking slapper, and if we were it would only be to shit in your wedding cake." 8O

    Or have I not quite got the gist of what you're trying to get across? :D
  7. Funnily enough same thing happened few weeks back. Cousin who had power of attorney sold my Aunts house to her daughter for feck all. Aunt being in a home etc. Tawt!!

    Daughter was getting wed and we recieved invites. Myself I would have told them to go feck spiders. Since my brothers wife died fourteen months ago not one on that side of the family has picked up the phone see how he is coping. Plus the selling of Aunts home cheap.

    My sister wanted a escape route out of this wedding. Simple she popped over to Ireland for a week.

    If in doubt tell them to go feck off!!

    You can pick your friends but you canna pick your relations!!!


    I never even sent a card!! Boy will I lose sleep over that!!!!
  8. janner

    janner War Hero Book Reviewer

    Dear ********, shove your invitation and the wedding car up your well shagged arse.

    Seems to convey the message without being to long.
  9. silverfox

    silverfox War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    ...or for novelty value, reverse the idea - shag the groom and fill in the bridesmaid....
  10. Accept with good grace. Then have a bit of a punch up at the reception, after all no such event is complete without at least one 'performance'.
    Weddings Yuk!
  11. A + B= no church invite. Maybe your wife's sister feared/knew your wife would say no and didn't want to risk rejection ? 8O

    Don't know their characters so it's hard to say but guessing :

    a) Either it's an olive branch without actually having to pick up the phone (ie:swallow pride, always a toughie) :oops:

    b)Wife's sister wants to protect her 'moment' in church / reg. office from any bad atmosphere :?

    c) Just wants bums on seats ? :D

    Why don't they just meet over a coffee and thrash it out ? :roll:

    So much gets assumed in the heat of the moment in rows and they may just learn where the other one was really coming from. At the end of the day, they both lost a sister and that can't have been easy. People go a little odd when in grief at times.....they may view the past and each other differently now :?:

    It only takes one of them to pick up the phone and the one who does gets to be the better person.... :wink: Did they get on generally when younger ? Even if chatting doesn't heal the rift, it might ease the way.....negotiations take time, as does forgiving sometimes.... :oops: :)

    If it can't be resolved, just tick the 'No thanks' box on the invite and leave it. :) Ceremonies of any kind are somewhat tedious anyway. 8)

    Sorry for a long post, it's just not straightforwards and family rifts are quite saddening for all concerned.
  12. FlagWagger

    FlagWagger Book Reviewer

    "VMT MRU" works for me...
  13. Just send a letter saying "I'm sorry, and you are????"
  14. It works for me!
  15. Nay, don't titter, but I've been to a wedding where it happened. And no I was not the guilty party :oops:
  16. Dear whoever.
    Thank you for the invitation. We would love to attend, however, since winning a few Million on the Lottery recently our social calendar is full for the next 12 months. :D
  17. Dear cunt face will not be attending your recpetion but will happily attend your new husbands coming out/suicide/divorce party.

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