waiting for the police

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by stan_the_man, Jan 1, 2010.

Welcome to the Navy Net aka Rum Ration

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial RN website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. 8O Fcuking hell having run naked through the sleepy hamlet of Crafthole last night vomited over the doctors wife next door and done really bad things with my dog I am now cooking sausage sarnies with brown sauce and waiting for the law to arrive. I also have vague memories of exposing myself to the vicars wife and buggering one of the sheep in the field nearby, ok if your 21 but this year is my 53rd on the planet will I ever grow up??? Wonder what new year is like in Dartmour will keep you posted please send me roll up tobacco
  2. :lol:
    Ta SJRM pop in some wank mags as well :twisted:
  3. I fcuking love you!
  4. FFS Stan you boring [email protected] Same old thing every year.
    Why not do something different next year. :wink:
  5. And who dares say the matelot is not a classy breed? :D
  6. Who dares wins in Stan's case :D
  7. You are deliciously mental!
  8. Oh god, I'm 20 this year! Do I have to start learning to shag sheep? Is it better to put their back feet in your wellies so they can't get away? How can you pick out a sexy one?

    Enlighten me Stan ;)
  9. Use chest waders so you can muff them first. :twisted:
  10. *Takes notes*

    Standing them on the edge of a cliff. Worth it? :)
  11. What? and miss out on the kissing? :twisted:
  12. I could pull them up with the scruff of the neck and give them a rapists kiss? :twisted:
  13. Fcuk me got a head like a forty shilling pisspot no fecker in the village is talking to me, forgot the sheeps first name and the dog has fcuked off to the mother in laws with a sore arse, well that was 2009 bring on 2010 and off to watch Newcastle fcuk the pointy heads in the cup at Home Park tomorrow as they say here Get ON. Tad worried the wife called me Paul today???? And she didn't take it up the shitter should I think of divorce or fcuk off with whats its name the sheep with a blue mark on its arse??? Blackrat please advise
  14. Ageing_Gracefully

    Ageing_Gracefully War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    His name is Baaaaarry
  15. :D Nah he had a posh name with a slightly vague French accent, fcuking bad breath when I kissed him tho
  16. Ageing_Gracefully

    Ageing_Gracefully War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    It was probably a Welsh sheep which has spent the last few years holidaying on the Cote d'Azure.

    His name would have been Baaaaary-John :p
  17. Just got worse local brown hatter round for a drink already pissed and tells me he loves me do I :

    A let him suck my knob
    B Feed him to the dog
    C roger him with the rather stale cucumber in the fridge
    D Nut him
    E Help him to keep in touch with his masculine side
    F Ask him for his sisters address and knob her while he's drinking his martini
  18. A and D
  19. :D Facist cnut
  20. A & C

Share This Page