Valentines Weekend.

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by jjp23, Feb 8, 2010.

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  1. Well it’s that time of the year again, no doubt there will be large numbers of blokes up and down the country in bad books for cocking up Valentines day. There will be women who want the earth, women that say they don’t want anything but if you actually listen and get nothing then WW3 will break out. If you go out for a meal you will be ripped off, if you buy flowers you will be ripped off and get told that you could have used your imagination. All in all it is usually a no win situation.

    I have already ruined it apparently and I am now a the point of trying to make up for it just to be told “Forget about it.â€. So this week should be eventful in both mine and mrs jjp’s world.

    So chaps, have any of you cocked up yet or dreading one of the most pointless weekends off the year???

    Ps. Let it be known if you do manage to do something right the rewards should be good.
  2. I'm 'duty' every Valentines day.

    Then I go out on the piss with the lads. The following week she will have forgotten and everything will be back to normal.
  3. Having been married for 29 years now I don't bother apart from a card. Learnt a long time ago that whatever I did would be wrong, so I save a fortune and get in the sh1t anyway
  4. I have already achieved a vg sat for V day.
    On friday i flew down to the big smoke took her out for a lovely meal then took her shopping on the saturday because i wont see her this weekend.
    She is happy and i am up for a piss up beyond belief without the imposed limitations that are set when with my bitch.
    bring on the weekend when loads of depressed single women will want rough sex to make them feel loved for that one night when love is all that matters regardless of how long it lasts.
  5. jjp

    What makes you think you have ruined it already?


    Why not surprise her with something? (No WreckerL, not that .....)

    If you only ever buy a card, why not get some pretty flowers too - after 29 years you must know what she would like.

    Think she will be thrilled.
  6. 2DD, good work. Hopefully i will have the excuse for many years. Wrecker, i think i should of done that and saved some cash but unfortunately with her being a bit nuts it is easier for me to at least try :roll: .

    Seenoff, that can be described in one word, epic. :thumbright:

    Well sol, i had good intentions and used my remaining holidays to book this friday and the following monday off work. I planned a meal for the friday and just some time with her for the sat. But it's my mates 24th on the sat so i agreed to go out with him. I said to mrs jjp i would return from my night out not too late and see her all day sunday and monday.

    Reaction...."Shit hitting the fan"

    Apparently, i should have booked the meal for sat and i will be to hungover to be good company sunday. So there isn’t any point. All in all it all seems a bit petty to me and over the top. So there you go, my weekend summed up.
  7. Tried the flowers and chocolate routine many times and it became just that...routine. Might have a look around to see if anything jumps out at me (apart from ninjas of course)
  8. nil desperandum, jjp, this is still workable.

    let me think ......
  9. jjp

    Take for the meal Saturday, after the meal take her (accidently) to where your mates 24th party is and let her join in, then you'll both wake up hungover, she's had a meal and an impromptu (to her) party thrown in..bargain.

    And if she doesn't want to stay at the party....chloroform
  10. WreckerL

    Quick thought - whisk her away for a surprise weekend to Paris.

    OR and I like this one ........

    Tell her that the entire Valentine's weekend is all about her.

    Put your apron on and do all the housework, all the cooking, culminating with a fabulous dinner you have cooked for her on Sunday evening.

    Treat her to a beauty treatment on the Saturday, if she would like, or take her shopping for some pretty nethergarments.

    Tuck some pretty jewellery under her pillow.

    I should write books on this, I really should.
  11. Right, I am about to share one of my greatest secrets with you. If you dare tell anyone I will hunt you down and stab you. This method is really really simple, it requires very little work but looks like you have done loads.

    Follow these simple steps exactly and your missus will have no choice but to nosh you off:

    1. Play it cagey, explain you have a surprise sorted out but you don't want to spoil it.

    2. Obtain the following ingredients:

    Chicken breasts x 2
    Prosciutto or Palma Ham
    Sunblushed tomatoes
    Penne Pasta
    Red Roses x 12
    Candle x 1, burning for the use of.

    3. Cut a pocket into the chicken breasts, stuff the pocket with pesto and mozzarella. Wrap the now stuffed pockets in the Ham, bake in the oven until cooked.

    4. Boil the Penne.

    5. Arrange the candle and roses on the table so it looks like you have made a big effort.

    6. Serve the Penne with some more pesto, put the chicken breast on top. Scatter a few sunblushed tomatoes on top to add a bit of colour and ponce it up a bit.

    7. Reap the benefits.

    If this fails get a new missus, or a kitten.
  12. 'Ang on a minute. Valentine's day is not all about the woman. It should work both ways. It's valentines day for us blokes aswell. I remind SWMBO every year but it just seems to fall on deaf ears.
  13. I did all that this weekend as she was on a course plus if I did all that she'd think I was up to something and get a 24 hr grilling. The nethergarments would have been fine 20 years ago but they would be stuffed in the cupboard and ignored like the last lot I got her. Maybe choccy's again. Ain't married life grand :lol:
  14. janner

    janner War Hero Book Reviewer

  15. Aye, good shout. I very much doubt that this is realised by many women. In fact i would bet on it that if and it's a big if anyones missus gets them anything it will be either chocolate or aftershave.
  16. Drakey you are dead right but most blokes would rather get them something than have to put up with there moaning fcuking arses for a whole weekend or year.
    and now through my effort i have a week of epic pissing up with no comeback so therefore a result(and that is my present).
  17. What is this 'Valentines' you speak of?
  18. It started when Al Capone lined his enemies up against a garage wall and wasted them and thus a tradition was born.

    It's changed a bit over the years though.
  19. Another female perspective.

    I'm sure most women would agree that the best bit about Valentine's Day is spending some quality time together just the two of you. For me anyway, this means much more than presents.

    2_deck_dash that sounds perfect! My boyfriend usually cooks for me on Valentine's, then we cosy on the couch and watch a film with some nice beers. Then....

    This year I have made him a card using a nice photo of us on holiday recently from an online card company and I've got him a subscription to lovefilm. Would you guys appreciate this?

  20. I take it you mean porn?

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