Training Dits

Discussion in 'The Corps' started by montfish, Dec 5, 2009.

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  1. What was the worst/best/funniest/harshest thing that ever happened to you as a nod?

    (need some ideas as i have over 50 at my disposal for the next 20-plus weeks!)

    and for suggestions, bear in mind i actually want to keep my job!!!!
  2. Sprayed in the face with a CS aerosol, smacked round swede with pick axe helve, smacked on top of swede with SMG front sight, beasted numerous times.
    Spoon fight in the rifle pits at Straight Point, me with KFS spoon PW with soup ladle! :evil:
    Apart from that it was hoofin'! :D

    Legally there's always, "Round that tree and back to me last man gives me 20!...GOoooo!"
  3. Mud runs...oh how we laughed!
  4. As a part 4, moving into an 8 man mess with 7 old and bold field gunners!!! kin nightmare!!!
  5. Recruit Training

    Mid-winter on Dartmoor, knee deep snow, keening wind and freezing.

    Nod section attacks at Holming Beam just south of Black Dunghill. Boots wet, feet numb, fingers blue, eyes and noses running. No sleep, hungry, absolutely knackered from advancing to contact through the snow. Lungs on fire. Fighting order sparkling with frost and terribly thirsty. Can't drink because the water bottles have frozen solid.

    One Nod in a stumbling run disappears through the snow and suddenly his head reappears looking like the monster from the Black Lagoon. He had run into an old shell hole containing five feet of black slimey fart-water, perfectly cammed out with snow. Eventually drag him out amid various screams and curses from the training team and watch him depart on a stretcher in the back of the Land Rover.

    Dawning realisation that his SLR was still in the hole. Muggins strips off, rope round waist and slide into the hole feeling for the bondook with my feet. Find it after what seems like an hour but can't hook the sling with my foot. Descend through the sh*t and slime, grab the barrel and then get pulled clear on the rope.

    Doubled down to the stream to wash off and then allowed to dry off my kit in front of the training team's fire; but only after my weapon had been cleaned and inspected.

    'Appy daze

  6. Breaking the ice on Peter's Pool a good 'un. Just about the right time of year too!
    Run your troop up there for an Endurance acquaint acquaint, they can stand by and cheer the big Nods as they pass, it's character building! :lol:
  7. Cracking dit! If you told it down the pub, they just wouldn't believe you!

    Another weather related, 25th Jan 1990 speedmarching back off Woodbury after a happy and eventful few days camping. Unfortunately said double time bimble coincided with the great storm. Wind was such that we only made ground at quick march, when doubling we were blown back due to having both feet of the deck.

    4 miles covered, troop blowing out of its communal hoop standing in the wind tunnel that counted for cover outside the Navy Stores. One of the training team cpls puts us in the picture, "the goods news gents is that you finshed the speedmarch as a troop gents, the bad news is that the 4 miles has taken you 70mins". He was absolutely right to have us out onto the road for 15mins of fireman's carries round the camp.. oh how we laughed wheh Rct G dropped his SLR.
  8. Nah....................Global warming has taken over. Pete's Pool is only 2 feet deep, HSE has put handrails across and the biggest problems now are mossies and heat-stroke :thumbleft:

  9. Naked pays to be a winner, up a hefty sand dune, weapon above head (because you're worth it!)
  10. Kinell Lab you old sweat spinning dits circa 1990 when i was in holding troop. Would i know Rct G by any chance or is it AKA Smith S.A??? :D
  11. I'm old but I'm not that old, the man was, is and always will be a legend. His exploits don't translate to the written word (need to do the voice) otherwise the tribute thread would be there for all to pay homage.
  12. I'd heard that the Water Tunnel had been replaced by the Plastic Washing Up Bowl Full of Luke Warm Water (Dipping head in for the use of.), but that's taking things too far! :twisted:
    They'll be dishing out Green Lids like Les Beret Cherises next! 8O
  13. Rct training used to involve a weeks shooting at Trgantle Ranges , staying at Raliegh.
    Mon - Weds we speed marched back ( 5 miles ) each night.
    Packing up the ranges on thursday i foolishly asked the training team if we could remove our "wooly pullies " for the speed march back !
    only to be told that i could as i would be the only one speed marching back for asking a bone question.
    Guess what i did have to speed march back on my own and follow the 4 tonner whilst the rest of the lads pissed themselves

    lesson learned - i think so - never asked a bone question again - ever !

    happy days
  14. Myself and another RR member [Hoot] were zeroing L-42's at Straight Point prior to an NI deployment. We'd driven over from 42 at Bickleigh in our green Rover convertible [black upholstery] and were looking suitably ruggsy. Moustaches, sideburns, long hair, windproofs. Berets at a suitably jaunty angle, cap-badges somewhere over the left ear, para wings and kiss me quick badges, the biz. Basically stroppy recce troop PW3's, with Hoot as a mean Glaswegian corporal who not many people would like to fcuk with.

    The longs were zeroed in pretty well on the first day and the second day was marked up for putting some leisurely rounds down-range. Turn up at Straight Point and there is a pain in the arse RM sergeant PW1 with 2 Nods who are doing a GPMG classification re-shoot. He had been on the same 3's course as Hoot and had failed miserably and I knew him as a total cnut from NI.

    He looks at us, rolls his eyes and starts muttering something about cowboys and then announces that we will be shooting at 100 yards and then moving back incrementally to 600 yards with the Nods on the right with the Geeps and us on left. No problems.

    We then watch a display of shouting and screaming as the prick destroys what little confidence the Nods have. No attempt to teach them the tricks of firing a GPMG, just mental screaming. Hoot looks at me. I look at Hoot. Sorted. From 300 back to 600 we fired tight groups into the Nod's targets and the little darlings pass their re-shoot with top scores.

    Walk past the Nods at the end of the day as they are doing the "no live rounds, empty cylinders or clips in my possession" routine and give them a big wink and thumbs-up. PW1 knows he has been had but can't prove it. The Nods are glowing and Hoot and I are laughing like fcuk all the way back to Bickleigh.


  15. I wasn't aware that the village people were allowed to carry longs mate!!! :D 8)

  16. YMCA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Come to think of it Straight Point range runs out at 300 yards so maybe I exaggerated that as well :lol:

    RM :thumbleft:
  17. Comes with age mate!!! :D :D

    Taking cover!!! 8) 8)
  18. Muskets at dawn :lol:
  19. on newcastle town moor with RM Tyne, doing 4 man situps with a 50kg log. feet facing up a 30 degree slope and all three guys changing with the 3 remaining oppo's, leaving 5ft 4inch (60kg) me to take the crush sliding a good 8 feet down the slope

    i know i'm not a regular nod, but still.... :)
  20. :wink:

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