Todays Thought!

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by andym, Jun 16, 2006.

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  1. i never hold em in mate,

    other half wasnt impressed on honeymoon in spain tho,

    walked out of a lift at manchester airport after dropping a corker, and 4 bodies walked in, poor buggers were sealed in, lol.

    yours aye

  2. If you'd done that at Heathrow you'd have been carried away by 50 anti-terrorist policemen for interrogation and headline in The Sun the next day would have read:

    [marq=down][align=center]Farting Marine in honeymoon gas attack[/align][/marq]

    :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
  3. It should always be policy,to stand in the queue,in ASDA,let a loud one rip ,then stare at the old dear stood next to you,works a treat,my wife wont go shopping with me anymore.
  4. Following along the lines of shitty ideas try this dit:

    Read and understand, for this is the past, present and the future.

    In the beginning was the plan.
    And then came the assumptions.
    And the assumptions were without form.
    And the plan was completely without substance.
    And the darkness was upon the face of the Junior Rates.
    And they spoke among themselves saying,
    "It is a bucket of shit and it stinketh."

    And the Junior Rates went unto their Senior Rates, and sayeth:
    "It is a pail of dung, and none can abide the odour thereof"

    And the Senior Rates went unto the Coxswain and sayeth unto him,
    "It is a container of excrement, and it is very strong,
    such that none can abide it."

    And the Coxswain went unto the Jimmy and sayeth, "It is a
    vessel of fertilizer, and none can abide its strength." And the
    Jimmy spoke with the Old Man and Staff Officers, saying one to
    another, "It contains that which aids plant growth, and is very strong."

    And the Old Man went unto the Captain Submarine Squadron and sayeth to him,
    "It promotes growth, and is very powerful."

    And the Captain S/M’s went unto the Flag Officer Submarines, and
    Sayeth unto him, "This new plan will actively promote moral and
    fighting efficiency among Submariners."

    And the Flag Officer Submarine looked upon the plan, and saw that it was good.
    And the plan became policy.

    And this is how shit lands upon you.

  5. Great one Nutty, I can instantly tell that you were a Submerged Padre sometimetime in your life! :lol: More... More!..
  6. It all makes sense now.
  8. Hate ladies ones when there to Fxxxxxxxg ripe , was just about to go down on a barmaid a few years back , when she excused herself , cocked her leg and farted , well I can tell you it sort of put paid to me going down below :roll: :p :lol:

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