TLA or what the hell are these new Matelots talking about...

Discussion in 'Joining Up - Royal Navy Recruiting' started by Guns, Aug 31, 2009.

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  1. Guns

    Guns War Hero Moderator

    From another thread I got accused of using to main abbreviations.


    So to help people along

    PWO - Principal Warfare Officer. A steely eyed bringer of death who sits in the Ops Room and fights the ship on behalf of the Captain. Of course if you ask the Chiefs they will tell you we are good for mustering crypto, signing request forms and organizing pointless meetings. Used to be 4 types PWO(A) - The gunnery officer of old. Fighting the above water battle. Very much the god like figure you expect. PWO(U) - Underwater warfare and the kind of person who was bullied at school and so has a quiet voice and needs time to think things through. PWO(CEW) - Communications and... well Comms. Finally the PWO(N). Really a Specialized Navigator and would have been a PWO before. Now the system has changed and every bronzed god leaving Collingwood is a PWO. You specialise after your first job (AAWO Anti Air Warfare Officer - fighting the above water battle. FASW - Fleet Anti Submarine Warfare Officer - fighting the evil smelly submariner and PWO(CIS) - Communications and Information Systems. New course and no one really knows much yet.

    BULW (example) - All RN ships now have a 4 letter designator. Helps shorten names for signals, automated IT systems etc. Used by many navies not just NATO. Example would be HMS BULWARK is BULW, USS MITCHER would be MITS and FGS DUPLEX would be DUPL. Helps when working with the Greeks and you only have to spell out 4 letters ;-)

    LPD - Landing Platform Dock. The new command platforms HMS BULWARK and ALBN (see above para) which move men and equipment. But more importantly act as Flagships to a allow Commanders to Command their forces. Might not be RN/RM - BULW (see what I did there) recently had JFHQ (See next) on board for a major exercise and they where commanding Maritime, Land and Air forces.

    PJHQ/JFHQ - Permanent Joint Headquarters, based at Northwood London and responsible for all Joint Operations. Responsible for Gib, Falklands, Iraq etc etc. Working for them is a rapid deployable HQ JFHQ (Joint Forces HQ) commanded by a 1 Star (see next) who commands what ever forces are given to them.

    Stars - Used to denote various senior officers.
    Cdre/Brig - 1 Star
    Rear Adm/Major Gen - 2 Star
    Vice Admiral/Lt Gen - 3 Star
    Adm/Gen - 4 Star
    So if you work at CINCFLEET HQ in Portsmouth you are working for a 4 Star. 3 Cdo Bge Royal Marines is commanded by a 1 Star so is a 1 Star Battle staff.

    Hope this helps and I am sure others will add. If you would like to know what a particular abbreviation is post here.
  2. Re: TLA or what the hell are these new Matelots talking abou

    Thanks for that guns ..but I have devised a clever way of dealing with long posts with lots of abbreviations

    I don`t read erm…

  3. Re: TLA or what the hell are these new Matelots talking abou

    :? Fcuk em all bar one;- and bollocks to him :pain10: I'm going down the boozer :lol:
  4. Re: TLA or what the hell are these new Matelots talking abou

    you will also find PWOs(A) to be a quiet, modest, shy and retiring types.

    [I am a Gunnery Officer as well!]
  5. Re: TLA or what the hell are these new Matelots talking abou

    You stole this plan from me, and Jesse am I classed as a fcuk em all, or a bollix to him?

    I don't love you two anymore. :cry: :cry: :wink:
  6. (granny)

    (granny) Book Reviewer

    Re: TLA or what the hell are these new Matelots talking abou

    Quiet, modest and retiring.. Also a Gunnery Officer!... It's a contradiction of terms :?
  7. Re: TLA or what the hell are these new Matelots talking abou

    Don't things look really impressive when written in capital letters and abbreviated to add more importance. Almost like a Victorian great aunt!
    Still if the fleets not exactly big enough we can sure scare them with our "new speak" :D

    Edit to add. My other half has got it off to a T.
    She's abbreviated "Standby/Standto" OY! :wink:
  8. Seaweed

    Seaweed War Hero Book Reviewer

    In order to be a successful Gunnery Officer you need to know a few things:

    1. You were put on this earth to rule over the lower orders, and if they do not understand this, that is merely a sign of their own inadequacy.

    2. You were NOT put on this planet to be liked or popular. Temper your every action with a little bit of injustice.

    3. You joined the navy to use your undoubted brain to beat the sh!t out of the Queen’s enemies, not to go sailing on the cheap. If HM is short of enemies, practice on those around you.

    4. Organise everyone else before they organise you. It is not enough for your own part of ship to be immaculate. Make your presence felt in everybody else’s as well. In particular, if SCO gives any trouble, strangle him with his own silk handkerchief, kept handy for the purpose in his top pocket.

    5. Your Captain is only a bit distant because he knows you are right (however, if he is himself a Gunnery Officer, he is the one that is right).

    6. Do not shrink from underhand manipulation or minor bribery in order to accomplish your aims.

    7. You should open fire in rapid spread lines with five per cent of the outfit. This is also a useful metaphor for your dealings with people who oppose your plans.

    8. It is all lies that you straddled the Weymouth ferry, and anyway they are used to it.

    9. It was an honour and a privilege, and a useful exercise in seamanship, for the Wafus in that helicopter to have such a close-up view of your AA shoot.

    10. R double dot = - Rp omega squared. Lesser beings do not know this.

    11. Nothing cancels the order STILL! Except the order Carry On.

    12. Stick at it, because your branch has the best chance of clewing up in the House of Lords.

    13. Lesser beings make do with ten commandments. Another sign of how simple they are.
  9. Not forgeting the experiance of the POGI who you depend upon, :wink:
  10. (granny)

    (granny) Book Reviewer

    Also to blame when things go wrong! :arrow:
  11. Why do POGIs sound like a Stuka when gently telling you to march f&£&@@"@&'jjng correctly? Are they castrated before joining up or after being selected to point shooty things at people? ;)

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