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Time away from family's

Jen_M

Badgeman
Hello,

I'm going for my interview on Thursday and under "family support for application" type enquiries, I'll have to be honest and say my parents do not really support my application. I've previously said they were hoping I would continue in education and get a masters degree or become a teacher. There is also the added extra of my little sister who is 4, who I have a very strong bond with, and having to move away from her will be very very hard. How do others cope either with time away from loved ones, children, siblings etc? And also those whose parents are less than enthuastic in your decision to join the RN?

Time away is of course both an advantage and disadvantage - I am looking forward to the travel and experience, but missing out on time with my sister and watching her grow up will be difficult.

Any thoughts...
 

tommo

War Hero
It's something I just got on with, yes I missed family and friends, the use of email and mobile phone eventually came in but most of the time on Deployments I wrote letters and phoned home every so often.

When away you will be occupied with other things which usually take your mind off things, and there are plenty of others who are the same.

As for parents who are less enthusiastic, the end of the day it's your choice and that will make it easier than parents pushing you to join.

They will have to get used to the idea and hopefully support you.
 

WreckerL

War Hero
Super Moderator
Personally my parents were happy to see me go. Different when I got married and had kids. Always had my melancholy moments after a couple of weeks away but I soon got over it and just cracked on with the job, being seperated doesn't last forever and makes you appreciate home all the more as you don't get complacent.
 

Ninja_Stoker

War Hero
Moderator
As Tommo states, family/partner support is very much a pivotal factor in some people opting to leave the service in the initial stages of training. Most later regret it & wish to re-join.

Everyone suffers from home-sickness to a greater or lesser degree & for that reason we keep you quite busy when you first join so you have little time to dwell. It is something you grow used to as you begin to bond as a team with your fellow joiners & realise they all feel the same.

Once on an operational ship, you can expect to be deployed routinely for periods of up to 6 months in every 18, with many shorter periods away from UK in between. When alongside in UK, you can generally travel home about 3 weekends out of every 4. When deployed overseas, there maybe opportunities to fly out partners/family whilst you take leave abroad.
 

Jen_M

Badgeman
Thanks, yes I am sure if I quit now I shall seriously regret it. But my RN application did come out of the blue for my parents, but they'll have to adjust - I am sure they will realise how much my career means to me when I pass out at Raleigh.

I am lucky to be joining in a time in which email and mobile phones can be used to keep in touch, as well as letter etc.

Thank you
 
WreckerL said:
Personally my parents were happy to see me go. Different when I got married and had kids. Always had my melancholy moments after a couple of weeks away but I soon got over it and just cracked on with the job, being seperated doesn't last forever and makes you appreciate home all the more as you don't get complacent.

8O Surely not! :roll:

Jen, my grandad's first deployment lasted quite a few years. Left the G Spot, had a week's leave, then off. Joined ship and saw parents again when 20! Things have changed a bit since those days! :lol: For parents: from fresh faced 15 year old to a bearded adult! Then again, they hailed from Plymouth, SO THEY WERE TOUGH! :twisted:
 

jjp23

Lantern Swinger
Hi, when i told my parents it was a big shock for them to as i am going to leave a potentially good career behind. But when the realised i could have a good career in the RN and that i was doing something i wanted they have got used to it. They just want to make sure i stay in touch when i can.

I am sure that they will get used to it more and be very proud of you.

James
 

WreckerL

War Hero
Super Moderator
thingy said:
WreckerL said:
Personally my parents were happy to see me go. Different when I got married and had kids. Always had my melancholy moments after a couple of weeks away but I soon got over it and just cracked on with the job, being seperated doesn't last forever and makes you appreciate home all the more as you don't get complacent.

8O Surely not! :roll:

Jen, my grandad's first deployment lasted quite a few years. Left the G Spot, had a week's leave, then off. Joined ship and saw parents again when 20! Things have changed a bit since those days! :lol: For parents: from fresh faced 15 year old to a bearded adult! Then again, they hailed from Plymouth, SO THEY WERE TOUGH! :twisted:

Dit on..When my parents threw me on to the Ipswich train they went straight to the shops and bought their first colour telly. Their excuse was they wanted to watch the wedding of Princess Anne and Mark Philips in colour (they got married the day after I joined) and didn't buy one earlier "in case it upset me" 8O
 

Ja5on

War Hero
Talking of TV's I remember going to the shop with my dad and choosing a TV with the right colour wood veneer to match the rest of the funiture in the house. You opened the front door to watch it and to change channels you pushed a button and the button that was depressed for the channel you were watching popped back out. Mum tastefully put a doyley on top and a vase with flowers. We had the TV untill 1995 which was 7 years when we upgraded to a black plastic one, that took up a whole corner of the room as it stuck out so far.
 

WreckerL

War Hero
Super Moderator
Ja5on said:
Talking of TV's I remember going to the shop with my dad and choosing a TV with the right colour wood veneer to match the rest of the funiture in the house. You opened the front door to watch it and to change channels you pushed a button and the button that was depressed for the channel you were watching popped back out. Mum tastefully put a doyley on top and a vase with flowers. We had the TV untill 1995 which was 7 years when we upgraded to a black plastic one, that took up a whole corner of the room as it stuck out so far.

Was the telly in the garden :?: 8O
 
WreckerL said:
thingy said:
WreckerL said:
Personally my parents were happy to see me go. Different when I got married and had kids. Always had my melancholy moments after a couple of weeks away but I soon got over it and just cracked on with the job, being seperated doesn't last forever and makes you appreciate home all the more as you don't get complacent.

8O Surely not! :roll:

Jen, my grandad's first deployment lasted quite a few years. Left the G Spot, had a week's leave, then off. Joined ship and saw parents again when 20! Things have changed a bit since those days! :lol: For parents: from fresh faced 15 year old to a bearded adult! Then again, they hailed from Plymouth, SO THEY WERE TOUGH! :twisted:

Dit on..When my parents threw me on to the Ipswich train they went straight to the shops and bought their first colour telly. Their excuse was they wanted to watch the wedding of Princess Anne and Mark Philips in colour (they got married the day after I joined) and didn't buy one earlier "in case it upset me" 8O

Poor Wrecky! :cuddle: Some of us appreciate you! :)
 
Ja5on said:
Talking of TV's I remember going to the shop with my dad and choosing a TV with the right colour wood veneer to match the rest of the funiture in the house. You opened the front door to watch it and to change channels you pushed a button and the button that was depressed for the channel you were watching popped back out. Mum tastefully put a doyley on top and a vase with flowers. We had the TV untill 1995 which was 7 years when we upgraded to a black plastic one, that took up a whole corner of the room as it stuck out so far.

My grandparents had one of those, bought to watch the CORONATION! 8O

The whole of Guzz were crammed into their tiny living room to watch! :roll:

That's probably why they moved to Leeds later...... :lol:
 

Ja5on

War Hero
WreckerL said:
Ja5on said:
Talking of TV's I remember going to the shop with my dad and choosing a TV with the right colour wood veneer to match the rest of the funiture in the house. You opened the front door to watch it and to change channels you pushed a button and the button that was depressed for the channel you were watching popped back out. Mum tastefully put a doyley on top and a vase with flowers. We had the TV untill 1995 which was 7 years when we upgraded to a black plastic one, that took up a whole corner of the room as it stuck out so far.

Was the telly in the garden :?: 8O

Front door was on the TV so you could shut it away because if you think telly is crap now you should of seen the crap we had to watch and it only had four channels. When it was shut away we used to play board games or listen to the radio life in those days was pretty dull compared to now.
 

WreckerL

War Hero
Super Moderator
Ja5on said:
WreckerL said:
Ja5on said:
Talking of TV's I remember going to the shop with my dad and choosing a TV with the right colour wood veneer to match the rest of the funiture in the house. You opened the front door to watch it and to change channels you pushed a button and the button that was depressed for the channel you were watching popped back out. Mum tastefully put a doyley on top and a vase with flowers. We had the TV untill 1995 which was 7 years when we upgraded to a black plastic one, that took up a whole corner of the room as it stuck out so far.

Was the telly in the garden :?: 8O

Front door was on the TV so you could shut it away because if you think telly is crap now you should of seen the crap we had to watch and it only had four channels. When it was shut away we used to play board games or listen to the radio life in those days was pretty dull compared to now.

I'll accept that as a bite. Thanks for the "we had it tough" dit, seeing as I'm 52 I've a vague idea how it was "back in the day" :roll: Can I ask how old you are?
 

Zoidberg

War Hero
WreckerL said:
I'll accept that as a bite. Thanks for the "we had it tough" dit, seeing as I'm 52 I've a vague idea how it was "back in the day" :roll: Can I ask how old you are?

He probably thought you'd gone senile and needed to be reminded :lol:

EDIT: If he was 7 in '95 he's 20/21
 
Ja5on said:
WreckerL said:
Ja5on said:
Talking of TV's I remember going to the shop with my dad and choosing a TV with the right colour wood veneer to match the rest of the funiture in the house. You opened the front door to watch it and to change channels you pushed a button and the button that was depressed for the channel you were watching popped back out. Mum tastefully put a doyley on top and a vase with flowers. We had the TV untill 1995 which was 7 years when we upgraded to a black plastic one, that took up a whole corner of the room as it stuck out so far.

Was the telly in the garden :?: 8O

Front door was on the TV so you could shut it away because if you think telly is crap now you should of seen the crap we had to watch and it only had four channels. When it was shut away we used to play board games or listen to the radio life in those days was pretty dull compared to now.

I assume you're around my age?!! 26?! Kids these days dont know there born do they? And I'll tell you another thing - board games were board games back then weren't they? Ker Plunk? Buck-a-roo? None of this new fangeld electrical stuff back in the ol' days (1992 - long before the invention of the light bulb!).

Now, off to listen to the Archers. Kids. Huh. I fought in a playground for these little gits.
 

Ja5on

War Hero
DavidK1983 said:
Ja5on said:
WreckerL said:
Ja5on said:
Talking of TV's I remember going to the shop with my dad and choosing a TV with the right colour wood veneer to match the rest of the funiture in the house. You opened the front door to watch it and to change channels you pushed a button and the button that was depressed for the channel you were watching popped back out. Mum tastefully put a doyley on top and a vase with flowers. We had the TV untill 1995 which was 7 years when we upgraded to a black plastic one, that took up a whole corner of the room as it stuck out so far.

Was the telly in the garden :?: 8O

Front door was on the TV so you could shut it away because if you think telly is crap now you should of seen the crap we had to watch and it only had four channels. When it was shut away we used to play board games or listen to the radio life in those days was pretty dull compared to now.

I assume you're around my age?!! 26?! Kids these days dont know there born do they? And I'll tell you another thing - board games were board games back then weren't they? Ker Plunk? Buck-a-roo? None of this new fangeld electrical stuff back in the ol' days (1992 - long before the invention of the light bulb!).

Now, off to listen to the Archers. Kids. Huh. I fought in a playground for these little gits.

Yep about your age slightly older there was electrical games they consisted of Operation which buzzed when you did it wrong and that stupid wire game where you had to move around a set wire pattern without the wire handle thing touching any of the wire shape. Thats as sophisticated as it got untill the amstrad and spectrum came along.
 

sparkerbuntingnowcis

Lantern Swinger
I don't know about the rest of you, but after a few years of marriage the wife often asked the question "when are you back at sea?".

Also for us married blokes, a deployment was like going on a lad's holiday. Happy days!

All joking aside it takes a special kind of woman to deal with the seperation, mind you she did alright out of it she came out to Barbados and New York and that was in the same deployment.
 

Joe90

Badgeman
My mum and dad don't even know i'm joining. But i'll break the news to them probably a month before Raleigh.

I don't think my parents would be too pleased about me joining the navy as they would think it's more difficult to get married if you're in the armed forces............with the long time spent away from loved ones.
 

sparkerbuntingnowcis

Lantern Swinger
Joe90 said:
My mum and dad don't even know i'm joining. But i'll break the news to them probably a month before Raleigh.

I don't think my parents would be too pleased about me joining the navy as they would think it's more difficult to get married if you're in the armed forces............with the long time spent away from loved ones.
[marq=up]

What's the rush about getting married, the RN is about enjoying yourself, doing something worthwhile, and going around the world on the lash and getting lucky.
 
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