Things that p**s you off - post your rants

Some of the to**ers on the Apprentice. Last week they were measuring an octopus in Malta when it was pretty obvious that they had got the wrong object. The blokes team that triumphed in the boardroom were convinced that they were the dogs knackers! It cheeses me off that some of these numpties are going to earn lots of dosh and some might even have government related jobs. Apart from that, they are wonderful!

Phone rings "Lord Sugar will meet you at the Shard, the cars will be outside in 20 minutes", not one of those prima donnas could even get changed in 20 mins!!!
 
Idiot drivers on Dartmoor.
This weekend I had cause to go pup to Princetown. There were quite a lot of sheep on the verge for much of the way from Plymouth. I had passengers in the car so adopted a policy of increased caution (I always drive with care on the moor anyway) and drove so as to ensure that I was clear of any roadside sheep whilst varying my speed from 25 - 40 whenever I deemed it necessary. On one occasion having just passed a few sheep and I increased my speed, the duty wide-boy decides to get the revs on from three cars back and leaves me in a cloud of exhaust as he rocketed past at somewhere around 50-60 swerving around the non-plussed sheep. It's all very well showing off to your trophy passenger how fast you can go past bored sheep and bored drivers but it ceases to be funny if you hit one of the aforementioned sheep and cause a pile up of other vehicles trying to avoid the ensuing mutton carnage.
Bellend. Him, not me. Grrr.
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Old (and I mean very old) drivers.

I was driving down to to Plymouth today from oop North and I stopped at Sedgemoor services for a break.

On returning to the M5 I was stuck behind a group of cars. Normally this irritates me 'cos I like to get a good clear run to build up speed to rejoin the motorway in a safe manner.
This time I could see something wasn't quite right with the leading car so I hung back a little bit...

I was correct.

Despite having one of the best and longest slip roads leading onto the motorway, this particular twat decided to proceed at about 30mph and then immediately joined the M5 without using the sliproad at all, causing absolute mayhem behind him. A lorry had to brake suddenly, causing another lorry behind to do the same.
A van swerved into the middle lane to avoid the braking lorries, causing various cars behind to brake suddenly, some changing lanes and causing further problems further back.

It was only down to to the skill of the two lorry drivers and a bit of luck that a serious incident was avoided.

When I eventually passed the culprit (he was now doing about 40 mph) I saw an old chap who looked about 90 crouched over his steering wheel, clearly oblivious to what had just happened.

I'm absolutely sure this knobend will cause an accident soon.
The problem is, it won't be him that gets hurt, it will be some poor innocent bugger and he'll just drive away, unaware of the carnage he's just caused.

And he's not the only one out there... :mad:
Sorry about that @Ballistic . I was trying to get my Polo Mints out of the glove box. Where was everyone rushing off to?
 
Old (and I mean very old) drivers.

I was driving down to to Plymouth today from oop North and I stopped at Sedgemoor services for a break.

On returning to the M5 I was stuck behind a group of cars. Normally this irritates me 'cos I like to get a good clear run to build up speed to rejoin the motorway in a safe manner.
This time I could see something wasn't quite right with the leading car so I hung back a little bit...

I was correct.

Despite having one of the best and longest slip roads leading onto the motorway, this particular twat decided to proceed at about 30mph and then immediately joined the M5 without using the sliproad at all, causing absolute mayhem behind him. A lorry had to brake suddenly, causing another lorry behind to do the same.
A van swerved into the middle lane to avoid the braking lorries, causing various cars behind to brake suddenly, some changing lanes and causing further problems further back.

It was only down to to the skill of the two lorry drivers and a bit of luck that a serious incident was avoided.

When I eventually passed the culprit (he was now doing about 40 mph) I saw an old chap who looked about 90 crouched over his steering wheel, clearly oblivious to what had just happened.

I'm absolutely sure this knobend will cause an accident soon.
The problem is, it won't be him that gets hurt, it will be some poor innocent bugger and he'll just drive away, unaware of the carnage he's just caused.

And he's not the only one out there... :mad:
You are very right. Driver in his 80's, wrong way down the motorway towing a caravan.
M40 crash: Three dead after caravan travels wrong way
  • 18 minutes ago

Image [email protected] captionThe M40 northbound was closed overnight after the crash
Three people have died after a car towing a caravan crashed into two cars while driving the wrong way on the M40.
The Subaru Forester was travelling south on the northbound carriageway when it hit a Ford Mondeo and a Ford Focus at about 16:00 BST on Monday.
The driver and passenger, both in their 80s, and the driver of the Ford Mondeo who was in his 30s, died in the accident.
The carriageway was closed overnight but has since reopened.
Thames Valley Police said no-one else had been injured in the crash.
Sgt Beth Walton added: "We are in the early stages of the investigation, in which sadly three people died and our thoughts are with their families.
"We are in the process of contacting witnesses who provided a report to us and are grateful for their support."
 
Pipe the same in the Pusser those that can cross the gangway in the next 20 mins can have leave, stampede:)
They would not have the same skills that we acquired ie waking up shit faced (Gib, Malta) or the likes after being shaken by an oppo , having a quick dhobi, dressed in 8s and still make turn to on time - in some cases after having a slurp of tea as well!
 
They would not have the same skills that we acquired ie waking up shit faced (Gib, Malta) or the likes after being shaken by an oppo , having a quick dhobi, dressed in 8s and still make turn to on time - in some cases after having a slurp of tea as well!
Then, ideally finding a niche to hide in for an hour's snooze...like spare gear store, DB Party store ( bales of rags to lo crash on), diving store etc.....then turning too properly just in time for 'up spirits'......Memories are made of this!! :)

PSOF's R Us,..........:) :)
 
Then, ideally finding a niche to hide in for an hour's snooze...like spare gear store, DB Party store ( bales of rags to lo crash on), diving store etc.....then turning too properly just in time for 'up spirits'......Memories are made of this!! :)

PSOF's R Us,..........:):)
You don't have to give me neaters, one in one will do. (Sung to the tune of Dusty Springfields You don't have to say you love me).
 

guns1969

Lantern Swinger
Chrimbo Adverts:

It's the 1st November and I am already Pi55ed Orft about about the ads already appearing on telly, notably Currys/PC World. FFS kick Chrimbo back into December !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
Spent Saturday building 4 motorised scooters for Grandchildren, xmas prezzies, I said why, just wrap them? Good job we did one had been manufactured wrong and could not be built as supplied, I could have altered it to work, but should not need to for new. Bolt through front wheel, thread just fit but the last inch of unthreaded bolt would not fit.:(:mad:
 
Spent Saturday building 4 motorised scooters for Grandchildren, xmas prezzies, I said why, just wrap them? Good job we did one had been manufactured wrong and could not be built as supplied, I could have altered it to work, but should not need to for new. Bolt through front wheel, thread just fit but the last inch of unthreaded bolt would not fit.:(:mad:

Surely that's what big hammers are for?
 
Then, ideally finding a niche to hide in for an hour's snooze...like spare gear store, DB Party store ( bales of rags to lo crash on), diving store etc.....then turning too properly just in time for 'up spirits'......Memories are made of this!! :)

PSOF's R Us,..........:):)
TILLER flat for me amongst the awnings, happy daze.
 
How about this to get up your snot box. Every year we go to a posh (ish) Xmas do. I wear my best whistle and flute with a bow tie. The other half has to travel the earth to buy a new outfit. We have been attending this annual do for the last five years. I ask why she cannot wear the outfit that she wore the first time that we attended. "Oh no, I can't wear that. People will recognize it from four years ago!" She wins. She has not put on a pound since she wore the first outfit so cannot say that it does not fit her. I went on Divisions for years in the same No. 1s. Same scrubbed lanyard etc. Never once did she offer to go to Billy Bernards and refresh my kit. If I would have got an Admirals kit muster she would probably said something useful like "I have not won at bingo for a week or two" . Peed off.
 
How about this to get up your snot box. Every year we go to a posh (ish) Xmas do. I wear my best whistle and flute with a bow tie. The other half has to travel the earth to buy a new outfit. We have been attending this annual do for the last five years. I ask why she cannot wear the outfit that she wore the first time that we attended. "Oh no, I can't wear that. People will recognize it from four years ago!" She wins. She has not put on a pound since she wore the first outfit so cannot say that it does not fit her. I went on Divisions for years in the same No. 1s. Same scrubbed lanyard etc. Never once did she offer to go to Billy Bernards and refresh my kit. If I would have got an Admirals kit muster she would probably said something useful like "I have not won at bingo for a week or two" . Peed off.
We all seem to suffer to some extent, with female logic, or lack of it when it comes to spending on them selves or spending on us?
I take it that also includes handbag, shoes, hairdressers, nail bar and make over, you on the other hand can go to a cheap barbers and have a shower?
 
Think I might boff all over the new outfit and get some satisfaction for my money. Her mates will surely remember seeing it covered in ewie.
 

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