Imagine:- Imagine there's no Ark Royal, Its easy if you try, They've fuck off all the carries, We've nothing left to fly, Imagine all the Wafus, Breaking down to cry. Oh oh, Imagine there's no skimmers, It isn't hard to do, There's nothing left to serve in, They've scrapped all the bases too, Imagine all the Navy, redundant from today, oh oh, You may think I'm a throbber , but I'm not the only one, Its all the fault of David Cameron, To name but just one. Imagine there's no money, I wonder if you can, They've stopped the children's benefit, And gave it all to Pakistan, Imagine all the liberals, Sharing all your dosh, You may think their all wankers, And your not the only one, Maybe some day we'll have explosives, And blow all the fuckers into one. [hr] Tune:-...Pub with no beer Oh its lonesome whilst waiting for Raleigh to call, Sitting there by the phone and not knowing fuck all, But there's nowt guaranteed more to get up your tits, Than to see on the telly the fleets got no ships. The Admiral's waiting for the money to come, He's been to the ministry all day on the bum, Fox is exhausted and dead on his feet, When Cameron tells him to sell off the fleet. The Pakistani President is laughing like fuck, He says the poor British are down on their luck, Their floggin their Navy, We're in for a treat, If they can't pay us millions we'll just have their fleet. They can give us Ark Royal, if they cannot pay, It'll look pretty dapper tied up in Bombay, We'll have a straw awning, and chickens down aft, And invite David Cameron to rename our new craft. We'll call it a name that will forever be known, A name that will make it a ship of our own, A name to tell how the ship came to our town, We could call it the downfall, Or the Gordon Brown. Prince Philip is sober for the first time in his life, Then he goes home cold sober to his darling wife, When he walks in the palace Liz sees his defeat, Then he breaks down and he tells her, Call me Daves flogged the fleet. It takes Liz a moment to take in what Phil said, But it dawns on her and she says , I'll take off his head, Its not his head said Phil I want on our walls, The twats flogged the fleet so I want both his balls. For its lonesome whilst waiting for Raleigh to call, Its took about two years and still you've fuck all, Ninjas redundant , and Super Mario's gone home, RNBC's been flogged off to pay off a loan. Edited ahead of the pedantics amongst us to say, yes Bombay (Mumbai) is not in Pakistan.