The re-invention of the English language

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by Montigny-La-Palisse, Aug 27, 2010.

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  1. Now, I like cars. Because I like cars I occasionally look for old classics to buy cheap, thrash or do up and sell on.

    Normally, one would think that in order to sell ones car, a well written advert is key. It would, however, appear that RR does not have the monopoly on illiterate halfwits. Here is a genuine excerpt from an advert I found:

    heres my renault 5 gt turbo in red on a G reg (1989) currently hasno tax as i have no insurence to tax it but will be comen with a 12 month m.o.t on it current miliage is 112 on the clock but dontlet that put you off as it stills drives like its only done 112 miles with no knocks,bangs,clunks or smoke always has bin warmed up and down

    Incidentally, he has advertised it for a quid, I would have taken him up on the offer had he not chavved the poor motor to death and ruined it.

    They are everywhere, this I also found on a Carlisle United messageboard I frequent:

    Zoko iz mint milez beta dan hirst, defo worth dollar alredy.

    I have no fucking idea what that even means, but that is messageboards and I'm not surprised. The advert however is brilliant. Does this mean, that in 30 years the English language will be permanently redefined and we won't know what the fuck anyone is talking about?

    Much like we do not say that thou hast yon fine steed over yonder, is this natural evolution? Or fucking retards too lazy to talk or write correctly?

    (Yes I've edited it and changed the title, the missus was shouting at me to help her get the shopping in.)
  2. Re: Mongs

    Never order a cake over the 'phone in Louisiana:-

  3. They're too fucking lazy MLP. Some use dyslexia as an excuse however they use text speak not dyslexic English. Now I'm not the best at writting in English. However I don't use text speak as there is no point as I get unlimited texts on the phone so no need to save credit and there is no need to use it on the internet.

    I hate it.
  4. I want to know, from someone in a position to answer, whether or not the mongs fill in job applications in chavmongspeak.
  5. sgtpepperband

    sgtpepperband War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    Err, I think it's a Northern thing. Innit... :shock:
  6. Mongs don't do jobs!
    They do however very successfully procreate and then do benefits :twisted:
  7. No but I know from secondary school teacher they're allowed to use in classes.
  8. Re: Mongs

    Monty - I certainly don't follow Carlisle's football team but a bit of searching at Google/Wiki, a generous allowance for your local dialect and BINGO - the meaning of your mystery mong message is solved:


    Zoko made his debut for Carlisle in the club's first game of the 2010–11 season, playing 75 minutes in Carlisle's 2–0 win against Brentford. He received a standing ovation from the Carlisle United supporters when he was substituted, and manager Greg Abbott said there's "more to come" from Zoko.


    Kevan James D. Hurst (born 27 August 1985 in Chesterfield, England) is a footballer who plays for Carlisle United as a midfielder, having signed from Scunthorpe United in the summer of 2009.

    "Zoko iz mint milez beta dan hirst, defo worth dollar alredy."

    = "Thus far Zoko is apparently worth the monetary investment, his performance being somewhat of an improvement of that of his team mate, Hurst."

    Almost as easy as a Times crossword pzll innit M8? :twisted:
  9. Tykes motto...............'If tha does owt for nowt, allus do it fo' thisen.
    'ear all, see all, say nowt.
    eat all, sup all, pay nowt.
  10. sgtpepperband

    sgtpepperband War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    Erm... no thanks. I've already got a 'Big Issue'. :oops: :twisted:
  11. Bloody reggies getting Big issues when us mere mortals get issued small ones :oops:
  12. Each generation makes it's own language, back in the 60's (before my time) everything was "Cool and Groovy Baby", when I joined up everything was "essence" or "Divs".

    Now we have "hoofing", ..."random" seems to be my daughters buzz word. Although "Cool" seems to be making a comeback.

    You should be able to take an axe to the head of some chav twat using text mong speak though.
  13. 'Back in the day'........Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
  14. Spid me old mate you bin a watchin too many 60's films.

    "Fab" was the 60's word and also if posh or a bit of a fairy "Sublime" was a catchy one.
    Cool was more a 50's Paul Anka kind of thing. :D :roll:
    I will allow Groovy if of the feminine or uphill variety. 8O 8)
  15. Please someone enlighten me as to why everyone south of Watford gap and between the ages of 11 and mid 20's tries to talk with a phony West Indian type accent, interspersed (do you like that word) with cockney expressions innit. 8O :?
  16. One of the reasons English has been so successful as a laguage is that it does adapt and cange with the times. It does reflect the current nature of society, and thus is always up to date and correct.

    Take away the flexibility and adaptability and English becomes a second rate language like French. As the language now belongs to the world there is little chance we can cock it up anyway.

    As it is txtspk is the natural successor to telegrammese whic was developed to allow businesses to comumicate using telegrams at minimum cost, the British Empire was built on what is now txtspk, so it is not new and has a very sound background as a subset of English

    Stop being a grumpy old man before your time

  17. My god its evolving as you speak :D :wink:
  18. What do you expect when I am sitting in Port Medoc and having to sample the local produce
  19. What exactly does Random mean when used by kids today?

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