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The Random Thread of Bollocks (NSFW)

It has been going on for a while now but is getting increasingly difficult not to offend especially if you have a "Jack" sense of humour like mine. The female of the species seems ready to take up the cudgels over the slightest thing being said to them or of them while they deem themselves free to say anything back without irony. There are other aspects of todays society who deem themselves beyond criticism while feeling no constraint themselves. I will not say who I think they are but leave you to draw your own conclusions
Me and the landlord of my local who is ex mob get some surprised looks from other punters due to our dark/lethal banter , more the fact we are pissing ourselves laughing at the abuse we are slinging at each other.
 
The Reverend John Flapps was the pastor of a small town church . One day he was walking down the High Street and he noticed a young lady of his congregation sitting in a pub drinking beer and singing bawdy songs with some matelots.
The Reverend wasn't happy. He walked through the open door of the pub and sat down next to the woman. 'Mrs Crowder,' he said sternly. 'This is no place for a member of my congregation. Why don't you let me take you home?' 'Sure,' she said with a slur, obviously very drunk.
When she stood up from the bar, she began to weave back and forth. The Reverend realized that she'd had far too much to drink and grabbed her arms to steady her. When he did, they both lost their balance and tumbled to the floor. After rolling around for a few moments, the Reverend wound up on top, her skirt hiked up to her waist.
One of the matelots looked over and said, 'Oi Mate, we won't have any of that carry on in this pub.'
The Reverend looked up and said, 'But you don't understand, I'm Pastor Flapps.'
The matelot nodded and said, 'Oh well, if you're that far in, you might as well finish.'
 

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