The most pointless or obnoxious MOD CS you have ever met?

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by clanky, Apr 22, 2008.

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  1. Whilst most of the truly obnoxious or irrelevant MOD civvies disappeard under options for change/SDR, there are still plenty of brown coated jacks in office floating around in MOD establishments. Think of the officious storekeeper, or the jobsworth security guard we have all come to know and love.
    One of my own personal favourites where the chaps employed to operate the open/close door buttons on the buses in Guzz Dockyard.
    Come on guy, spin the dit, who is the mongiest MOD CS?
     
  2. chieftiff

    chieftiff War Hero Moderator

    The worst one I met was also the biggest knob I knew in the mob! He left on a Friday after 37 years of achieving absolutely zero and somehow reaching WO1 only to reappear across the road on Monday as a CS.

    Bumped into him (literally) and he proceeded to explain how he had been "head hunted" and now held the equivalent rank of a Commander (even though he was getting paid less than a LH.) utter tosh of course but his ego needed a boost so I just let him waffle on. Then he asked how things were at work now that he had left, Oh how I enjoyed telling him just how much more cheerful people were at work now that he had left and how good the new warrant was, we even had a leaving do for him, without him..........
     
  3. go on then give us aclue
     
  4. A MOD civvy auditor used to visit us once a year, After the first visit, I never spoke to him again on 2 later visits for fear of dropping him, total wanker.

    Also a LEAN consultant at Culdrose circa 2005 and his side kick Wing Commander, rubbed people up the wrong way so much, that although it was a week of hell you put as many obstacles in his way as possible. Walked away numerous times and would of been within my rights to smack the Wing Commander. But stood up for my beliefs and colleagues, shortly after they were both moved on.
     
  5. chieftiff wrote:
    The worst one I met was also the biggest knob I knew in the mob! He left on a Friday after 37 years of achieving absolutely zero and somehow reaching WO1 only to reappear across the road on Monday as a CS.

    Bumped into him (literally) and he proceeded to explain how he had been "head hunted" and now held the equivalent rank of a Commander (even though he was getting paid less than a LH.) utter tosh of course but his ego needed a boost so I just let him waffle on. Then he asked how things were at work now that he had left, Oh how I enjoyed telling him just how much more cheerful people were at work now that he had left and how good the new warrant was, we even had a leaving do for him, without him..........

    go on then give us aclue


    I`ll take a guess was he a mess prez at Yeovs, a SMR of 810 early 90`s,
     
  6. was he ginger
     
  7. chieftiff

    chieftiff War Hero Moderator

    :rendeer:

    No but I know who you mean, when I was on 810 c1991 One Monday morning I asked the SMR(who was a Guz rating) for a lift to Plymouth on the Friday lunchtime, he said yes. Come Friday I pop into his office in the morning for him to sign my M&M chit:

    "Absolutely not" he says........ "but, but, but..... you said I could have a lift home" I reply laughing (this has to be his sick sense of humour I'm thinking, he'll wind me up then tell me to get in the car)

    "Only if you can get the time off, you should have asked me earlier in the week" he says. He then walked past the Squadron MU office where I worked, got in his car and drove home to Plymouth. Utter knob, there wasn't an ounce of humour in it either just pure malice, the second biggest knob I met in the mob :dwarf:
     
  8. Re: The most pointless or obnoxious MOD CS you have ever met

    Now you've got me started on snivelling servants again - Once sent an e-mail to PJHQ complaining that one of said brotherhood was an incompetent cnut, which in the way e-mails do landed in his and his bosses inbox. Subsequently ordered to apologise - sorry for calling you a cnut, but you called me an incompetent cnut, yeah sorry for calling you a cnut!
     
  9. Re: The most pointless or obnoxious MOD CS you have ever met

    Strangely I was just thinking of a former passed-over two and a half who did much the same.
     
  10. chieftiff

    chieftiff War Hero Moderator

    Re: The most pointless or obnoxious MOD CS you have ever met

    I think there is a secret underground CS head hunting team......... they never sought me out though......... thankfully!!
     
  11. Was having a few sherberts in the "Lord Moon on the Mall" in Whitehall, well known CS watering hole, when this DH was telling stories in a rather loud voice about a VICTOR III harassing one of our Black Messengers of Death somewhere "Up North". When I pointed out that this wasn't the place to advertise such details, he got quite offended, and asked who was I to question his judgement ? When I replied that I had done such trips, and not for his entertainment or to broadcast the fact so publicly, he calmed down somewhat. I still reported him to MoD(SY), which resulted in him being transferred to a finance branch - oblivion career wise, and never regretted doing it either. WANKER !!!!!!!!!
     
  12. copenhagencup wrote:

    I`ll take a guess was he a mess prez at Yeovs, a SMR of 810 early 90`s,

    Cheiftiff wrote.

    No but I know who you mean, when I was on 810 c1991 One Monday morning I asked the SMR(who was a Guz rating) for a lift to Plymouth on the Friday lunchtime, he said yes. Come Friday I pop into his office in the morning for him to sign my M&M chit:

    "Absolutely not" he says........ "but, but, but..... you said I could have a lift home" I reply laughing (this has to be his sick sense of humour I'm thinking, he'll wind me up then tell me to get in the car)

    "Only if you can get the time off, you should have asked me earlier in the week" he says. He then walked past the Squadron MU office where I worked, got in his car and drove home to Plymouth. Utter knob, there wasn't an ounce of humour in it either just pure malice, the second biggest knob I met in the mob


    Chris,
    I joined up with his son in 1986 needless to say it ran in the family.

    I remember in 1992 after being told by the skipper of Culdrose " Congrats on your Selection for this years Crew" Said SMR lets call him Bob refused to sign my draft chit and leaving routine. Needles to say a bollocking later for him and I was off.
     
  13. Its interesting that mention of their previous rank/rate at every opportunity is always a good indicator that the CS is a nob.
     
  14. Re: The most pointless or obnoxious MOD CS you have ever met

    Seems like MoD CSs are still pains in the rear end.

    Had one CS who worked with DGIA (as was) back when we were destoring the Maidstone.
    Spent all his time chatting up the female CSs in tha yard - until the panic set in to restore the Maidstone as a barracks/prison ship for NI in the 70s.

    I read him his 264s, but ended up with 7 days 9s because he was a 'senior' officer of the CS.
    Didn't get any support from the SO of the Supply Group, but then he was a lowerdeck promotion, and a tosser of the 1st class too (could hear all the convo we had even through his closed door !! :shock: ).

    I did find out much later that this CS was read the riot act by his Manager - didn't do me much good having to do pun at the time because of him though !
     
  15. Is there any other kind?
     
  16. Re: The most pointless or obnoxious MOD CS you have ever met

    Thinking about it, in my experience, it must be the canteen staff at Raleigh in the 70s.
    (I have mentioned them in a couple of other threads here).

    Those civvies used to dollop the food onto your plate with, at best, a morose grunt. Often snarling and snapping at any O/D or J/S with whom they thought they could get away with it. They spoke to the recruits as if they were dirt and they themselves held rank. Totally obnoxious bastards.

    I suppose one shouldn’t be surprised. After all, when you get people whose jobs are the bottom of the bottom of the pile, they need to over compensate.

    If they can assume some power or authority, they can try to use it to make other people feel bad. In that way they can feel better about themselves. Thus in denial of the fact that they really feel they are fcuk all, the bottom of the pile.
     
  17. Re: The most pointless or obnoxious MOD CS you have ever met

    Whilst I agree that I have come across quite a few Civil Serpants with knobs on their heads in my time I have found that they are now far outnumbered by the number of, lets call them 'Naval Sub Contractors' (there is a propensity for these people to work at training establishments!), that out do them in the CNUT stakes.

    And before I get a barrage of abuse from Brigham600 :notworthy: et al - I am not saying they all are!!!
     
  18. Sure he didn't say Lt Cdr? Buggers up my close guess profile otherwise.
     
  19. Re: The most pointless or obnoxious MOD CS you have ever met


    Dont be shy at Yeovilton the mighty SERCO have some the mightiest knobs ever created on gods earth. But with regards to CS i have met alot of jobs worth oxygen thiefs but in the same breath i have met just as many in the Navy. Always remember a PO Wren SA at Portland in 97/98 who worked in uniform clothing. What a pain in the arse she was. Had alot of old POMEM's from security going outside, She was asking for the sports kit they had at raleigh over 25 years ago. A few explained the errors of here ways with the famous saying of off and fcuck. :thumright:

    Also the RPO at Yeovilton who stood in the guardroom ready to pounce on unsuspecting sailors mid 90's. Just to name a few. :dwarf:
     
  20. Re: The most pointless or obnoxious MOD CS you have ever met

    Whilst you do get the odd knobber working for flagshaft, they tend not to have the dyed in the wool twattishness of a true old school MOD(N) civil servant, who knew that whatever happened, his TU would ensure he kept his job. :afro:
     

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