The Ghana Banana


War Hero
"Secrets of the Scammers"

TV Programme on a couple of nights ago, showed us mere mortals how to spot (and avoid) scams/rip-offs and cheaters. Now - the one that had me wetting my underwear involved our friends out in Africa, who promise us MILLIONS of dollars, pounds or Euros...just as long as we part with some of our own dosh first. there's a group of geezers who take great delight in winding these ****ers up, and one anti-scam on the scammer turned out to be what I would consider to be the ultimate "**** You Mate".

These part-time scammer-baiters wind 'em up until the scammer-twats are utterly convinced that the people they are E-mailing, talking to and dealing with are ****ing eejits and will be easily separated from their money.

And bloke (going by the name of Mister Pricky), arranges with his "mate" in Ghana for an exchange of money, with a view to purchasing a load of cheap gold at a knock-down price. Well...okay....says Gregory (out in Ghana) - send me da money. "Sorry, cannot do that right now - but may I suggest that we meet here in the UK to do the deal, after all - it's worth almost £50,000 to you?"

Scammers thinkin' - Okay then...I'll come over. Where shall we meet?

Scammer-baiter says "I do a bit of rambling around Cornwall, so I thought that you might like to get a bit of sight-seeing in as well.....I think that Rame Head would be a particularly nice spot to do the deal?"

Naturally, Gregory has never heard of ****ing Rame Head, but - eager to get a duffel bag full of wonga, is happy to agree to this and so, armed with Google maps, Satnav and a return flight from Ghana>>>London Heathrow (connecting train to Plymouth - taxi to Torpoint Ferry, bus to the arse-hole of Cornwall, and taxi down a rutted track to Rame head, off he sets.

Gregory keeps in touch with the bloke he's going to do out of fifty grand and is ALSO pinged by an anti-scammer spotter as he comes out of Plymouth Railway station.
"He's on his way", he reports by mobile - to his mate down Kernow way. Mister Pricky at Rame Head is happily mentally totting up just how much it has cost Ghana Gregory to get his arse from Africa to Rame Head, and as the nice gentleman steps out of a taxi, looking rather dapper in a nice mohair coat and dark suit - he's met by his "gullible" contact and Ghana man is ready to take charge of (what he thinks is) a bagful of money.

Unfortunately, as the pair of them begin to ramble upward towards Rame Head Chapel for a look, the much travelled and jet-lagged conning bastard is informed that "You are a scamming bastard and welcome to Cornwall you thieving ****er! How much did THAT journey cost you then eh? please get BACK in your taxi and **** off back to Ghana 'cos you have just been butt-****ed . Have a nice day"

Cameras cut to one befuddled and exteremely confused African gentleman who has just trundled a few thousand miles, only to be told to **** right off back from whence he came.

Ghana to Rame Head, absolute classic. Mister Pricky and his gang of mates really deserve a hip-hip-hooray from everyone who has had an E-mail from ******* such as "Gregory" and his bunch of low-life parasites.

I want a job as a Scammer-baiter. Sounds like ****ing fun.
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Lantern Swinger
jet-lagged conning bastard is informed that "You are a scamming bastard and welcome to Cornwall you thieving ****er!

This bit made me howl, especially when he apologised for his outburst later to the camera. He was a bit of a muscle bosun too, I thought he was gonna rip his head off!

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