The Difference Between the Infantry, the Artillery and the Armoured

[The_Caretaker]

The Difference Between the Infantry, the Artillery and the Armoured

HAPPINESS IS . . .

Infantry: A good rifle
Armoured: A big tank
Artillery: A loud boom

UPON HEARING FIREWORKS

Infantry: Cool, just like a live fire exercise
Armoured: Not loud enough
Artillery: Fireworks? What fireworks?

OTHER TRADES

Infantry: Waste of rations
Armoured: Waste of rations
Artillery: Waste of rations

IDEA OF FUN

Infantry: Not having to "pepper-pot" an entire grid square before the
objective
Armoured: Racing across a grid square on "full stab"
Artillery: Leveling a grid square

FAVOURITE SONG

Infantry: "Ballad of the Green Beret"
Armoured: "Purple Haze"
Artillery: Anything, just play it LOUD!

BIGGEST LUXURY IN THE FIELD

Infantry: Engineers blowing trenches for them with C4
Armoured: Grunts to dig their trenches for them
Artillery: Cable

A LONG ROUTE MARCH WITH FULL KIT

Infantry: 20 clicks
Armoured: From the hangars to the tank
Artillery: What's a route march?

OFFICERS

Infantry: Are morons and should stay away from the trench lines
Armoured: Are morons and should stay out of the vehicles
Artillery: Are morons and should stay away from the gun lines

FAVORITE MODE OF TRANSPORTATION

Infantry: Anything but walking
Armoured: Tanks. Tanks. Tanks. TankstankstankstanksTANKS!
Artillery: Don't you have to move around to require transport?

BIGGEST GRIPE IN THE FIELD

Infantry: The weather
Armoured: Coffee maker in tank not working
Artillery: Only having basic cable

BREAKFAST IN THE FIELD

Infantry: I don't care what it is, just so long as I can sit down to eat it
Armoured: Hot coffee and rum with a beer chaser
Artillery: Eggs over easy, crispy bacon, sausages, toast and fresh coffee