The Deficit.

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by BillyNoMates, Jun 22, 2010.

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  1. Re-introduce dog licences. Charge a tenner a year. National debt sorted. (We all love our doggies).

    Any other ideas that Mister Chancellor didn't pick up on then?
  2. You would end up buying three or more a week round my way if that happened. :wink:
  3. charge fatties a wieght tax for every pound they are over wieght they pay a pound a week and parents also get charged for there fat kids it would solve obesity and the deficit and reduce the nhs spending.
  4. Scrap the idea of giving old people extra money for bags of coal and kindling when it starts to get cold. They only waste it on trips to Aldi, buying food and such like. Just make them wear more clothes. This should save a shilling or three.
  5. Make people on benefits do simple jobs like road sweeping and litter clearing to earn their benefits, reducing the need for so many paid council workers.
  6. Also some will die of hypothermia saving even more money by reducing the number of spongers, you know it makes sense :thumbright:
  7. Are you saying road sweeping is simple?What about all the fancy stuff round lamposts.Took me fcukin years to learn a trade and all you do is fcukin mock me.20 years I've ad this broom :D :D
  8. cycle licence radio licence caravan licence .i think the list is endless :D
  9. let me guess in the 20 years your broom has had 8 new handles and 16 new heads hey Trig :wink:
  10. 1. Increase the rent of gay clubs to treble that of surrounding shops.

    2. All food shops to have scales in the door entrance. The medically obese pay a hefty surcharge to enter. This measure would filter through to the NHS.

    3. Stop all transplants for smokers and heavy drinkers.

    4. Confiscate all assets of kiddy fiddlers.

    5. Exotic cars (ferrari) etc to have road tax increased and also special petrol pumps where they also pay a hefty surcharge.
  11. force chavs to have gladiator fights in a Coliseum, not only will it bring in alot of cash through tickets and gifts but it will also bring down crime
  12. Every illegal immigrant/asylum seeker can stay and claim benefits if:
    1. Mine clearance for one formal training. (Saves our Brave lads!)
    2. Serve in a front line unit for one year to prove willingness to work for the nations greater formal training.
    3. If unable to work for genuine reasons (of which there are a few) learn the english language to at least a reasonable standard. This will save money on translators and writing signs out in 15 different languages.

    Agreed a little draconian, but im sick of people comming to this country and receiving my tax payments who then moan about what our country is/does. If you dont like it, cant/dont want to support the country you WANT to live in get out!

    That also applies to all native men and women who abuse our country! people have fought and died in the past, they gave their lives and often years of service to protect what this country, for our freedoms and privilages (privilages are earned!) but not so some miserable lazy cnuts can live off the fat of the land.

    Sorry for the Rant

  13. There should be signs written in fcuking big letters at the entrance to every benefits office and asylum 'drop-in'centre to this effect.
  14. Thanks for agreeing with me, at the end there I thought i'd gone a bit too far.
  15. Job Seekers allowance to be replace by a *Job-Fighters Allowance* Each job to be allotted to 20 or so wastes-of-space, who can then be shipped to the nearest field where they all have a fight to the death. (Clubs and blunt instruments provided free of charge). The winner gets the job - the corpses can be used as land fill for conservation projects.
  16. You can't have gone to far, you were giving them the chance to survive you big softy.
  17. Fcukin ell thats a bit arsh.Thats me fcuked on all 5 counts. :D
  18. A Supertax on the time-travelling Mad-Scientist / Evil Genius
  19. Have everyone in England, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland rummage down the back of their settees, sofas, armchairs and other soft furnishings for all that f***ing spare change thats disappeared over the years. Donate the bloody lot to the Government to pay some of the deficit off. F**k knows how much we could right off with all the shrapnel that's gone down the back of the furniture.

    What you didn't know you had - you'll never miss.
  20. A fuckin great fraud fine imposed on all those gobin off about the unemployed whilst they should be working.
    National insurance increased to 25% so those loafing about "at work" can pay more to keep me and V8topcat in a far grander life style than we presently enjoy.

    Tax increased to 60% on all those earning in excess of £25,000 p/a so that forces pensions can be doubled.
    No hospital treatment for anyone until they have paid enough into the Health service to cover their treatment.

    A tax on kids, and a tax levied like the poll tax so kids don't free load of the house council tax payer.
    They should pay by means of community work regardless of whether they are in full time employment, that's what their weekends off are for.

    Duty on booze waived for those unemployed or retired so as to let them drown their sorrows.
    Smokers to receive no treatment for any smoking related illness except as private patients.
    Mind you the reasons my list is so soft is because I'm in a good mood today. :D 8O :wink:

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