The dark art of getting served at the bar

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by sgtpepperband, Apr 11, 2009.

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  1. sgtpepperband

    sgtpepperband War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    News of great import has reached the BBC from the north-west of England. A pub landlord in Oldham is to introduce organized queueing to get to the bar in his pub.

    Do any of you have problems getting to the bar, & how do you resolve them? Personally, I find that liberal application of my trusty pick-axe handle cuts a good enough swathe through the masses.

    I might have made that last bit up. :oops:

    Alternatively, men could always adopt this tactic:


  2. I find that a good fart normally clears an area large enough for the staff to notice you. If that fails let another ripper go, the staff will not want you hanging around in their area too long :p
  3. (granny)

    (granny) Book Reviewer

    I always found that, when ordering the first round, give the Barman a good tip. Next time you appear he will head straight for you.
  5. The waiter normally brings my drinks to the table.
  6. (granny)

    (granny) Book Reviewer

  7. I've always found it easier if you have a sort of ...err... understanding with the barmaid 8)

    What's all this "barman" stuff anyway?
  8. In one of the working mens clubs I used to work in there was a railed off area in front of the bar to kind of force people to make an orderly queue.

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