Navy Net - Royal Navy Community

Register a free account today to become a member! Once signed in, you'll be able to participate on this site by adding your own topics and posts, as well as connect with other members through your own private inbox!

The Canadian


War Hero
A Canadian walks into a bar and ordered a beer. The bartender replied, "Sorry, we don't serve Canadians in this bar."

"But I'm really thirsty," the Canadian replied. "I'll do anything for a beer!"

"Okay," says the bartender,"if you can do three things, I'll get you a beer."

"First," says the bartender,"do you see that big guy standing by the door? 6'5", 275 pound ex-NFL linebacker who got thrown out of the league for being too mean and nasty? You gotta knock him out cold and drag him out of the bar. That's number one."

"Number two. Back in the kitchen we got this Doberman Pinscher. He's mean, he's nasty, he's vicious, he's hungry, and he's got a bad tooth. You gotta remove his bad tooth. That's number two."

"Number three. Upstairs we got a 70-year-old, 300 pound hooker. You gotta screw her until she climaxes three times. That's number three."

"I'll do it!" screams the Canadian. "What's first?"

"First is the big guy by the door."

The Canadian leaps to his feet and runs headfirst into the huge man. The two of them are rolling on the floor with fists and blood flying everywhere. Finally, the Canadian smashes a chair over his head and drags him from the bar.

Panting and bleeding, he askes the bartender, "Okay, what's next?"

"Number two is the dog in the kitchen."

The Canadian runs into the kitchen. The bartender hears barking, yelling, snarling, screaming, and jaws snapping, followed by a long, painful howling that obviously came from the dog.

The Canadian runs out of the bar, his clothes all ripped and filthy, and says to the bartender, "Okay, where's the old lady with the bad tooth?"
Thread starter Similar threads Forum Replies Date
MoD_RSS Emerging Canadian leaders in the medical field secure UK Government's Chevening Scholarship MoD News 0
MoD_RSS UK and Canadian Diplomats team up for Terry Fox Anniversary Run MoD News 0
MoD_RSS UK welcomes Canadian space sector MoD News 0
MoD_RSS Canadian FinTech firms set sights on the UK MoD News 0
MoD_RSS Leading Canadian high-growth SMEs announced for FinTech Mission to the UK MoD News 0
MoD_RSS UK pet product company stocked in 600 Canadian stores MoD News 0
MoD_RSS Vancouver Marks Final Canadian Stop on Red Arrows Tour MoD News 0
MoD_RSS PM meeting with Canadian Prime Minister at G7: 24 August 2019 MoD News 0
BreathingOutOnTheWayUp Oberon Class Manual (Canadian Version) Submariners 9
MoD_RSS Press release: UK Royal Air Force marks 100th anniversary by inspiring Canadian youth MoD News 0
janner Canadian U Boats. Submariners 7
MoD_RSS News story: Defence Secretary meets Canadian counterpart to further strengthen ties MoD News 1
MoD_RSS Speech: PM press conference with Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau: 18 September MoD News 0
MoD_RSS Press release: PM call with Canadian Prime Minister Trudeau: 20 June 2017 MoD News 0
MoD_RSS News story: Defence Secretary welcomes new Canadian Defence Policy MoD News 0
MoD_RSS Press release: PM call with Canadian Prime Minister Trudeau: 10 April 2017 MoD News 0
MoD_RSS Press release: PM call with Canadian Prime Minister Trudeau: 4 February 2017 MoD News 0
Guns Royal Canadian Navy The Afterlife - Resettlement and Jobs 0
S Two Royal Canadian Navy warships collide in Pacific Current Affairs 5
superpom Gay Pride Flag flown at Canadian Forces Base, Edmonton Alberta Canada today Diamond Lil's 1
Guns Royal Canadian Navy - HMS Winnipeg gets trashed by a trawler Current Affairs 10
M Prison for Canadian navy officer turned Russian spy Current Affairs 1
trehorn Canadian Navy / Reserves International 26
exspy Remains of a Sunken U-Boat found in Canadian River History 8
trehorn Canadian Submarines Recieving More Critisism Submariners 15
frogman007 Canadian Liberals! The Quarterdeck 0
Topstop Canadian/UK Frigates? Current Affairs 5
soleil Book: "Wearing The Green Beret: A Canadian With The Royal Marine Commandos" The Corps 3
A A Canadian Joke Nautical Jokes 0
I Looking for information on Royal Canadian Navy Personnel WW2 International 7
S Canadian Medals Current Affairs 11
trelawney126 Canadian Arctic Naval Exercises Current Affairs 0
F Joining the French or Canadian Navy International 17
A Canadian Angst Current Affairs 7
C Possible Canadian RM Walt needed The Corps 95
skyvet Canadian Respect Current Affairs 0
B Welsh Canadian Plonker The Quarterdeck 3
golden_rivet RUSI event on Royal Canadian Navy - 4th May History 6
D Canadian Army causes trouble in Cyprus! The Quarterdeck 5
Similar threads

New Posts