matelo99 said:
I hate the
[email protected]*king crabs.
Anyone got any good dits on the grief caused to them by the RAF?
While this is not an RAF dit, I feel your pain.
Early 80s and the boat was in Singers. We had been away many months and this was a quick R+R stop before heading home. I was one of the fortunate few who were to fly home, clear leave and meet the boat on arrival in Sydney. All good. Until we discovered that instead of a comfortable 8 hr QANTAS flight we would be trusting ourselves to the tender mercies of Crab Air.
We duly mustered at the Singapore Air Force base (formerly known as RAF Seletar from memory), and made ready to board our flight. As our aircraft was to be a C130 we must have made an amusing sight dressed in overalls, jumpers and foul weather jackets in the sweltering tropical heat! At this point we discovered from an evilly grinning Air Movements Officer that instead of a direct flight home we would be taking the scenic route via Malaysia.
After a couple of cold and noisy hours we were deposited at RAAF Butterworth, about half way up the Malay peninsula opposite Penang.
This was to be an overnight stop so we were (eventually) allocated some vermin infested quarters in the transit lines that appeared to have last been used by the Imperial Japanese Army in 1945. Well, any port in a storm as they say, and we were cheered by the prospect of a quiet ale or two in town that night.
The following morning we mustered at the Air Movements Section, just as an exquisite tropical dawn was breaking. Too bad we were much too hung over to appreciate it. There, to our surprise, we were told that we were not able to get the flight that day. It seems a Mirage fighter had blown up its engine and getting it back for repair was a higher priority than a dozen smelly submariners. When can we get a flight we asked. 3, maybe 4 days we were told by the totally uninterested staff, but stand by to go at any time. The up side of all this was I got to go back to my bug ridden rack and sleep for the rest of the day!
Three days passed slowly, drinking, eating and sleeping, finally we got the word - tomorrow for sure. To celebrate we naturally went on the piss and at some stage I drank a large amount of water from a tap in an alley behind a bar. This was to have repercussions later!
We were keen to get way and glad to finally be on our way, even the thought of another overnight stop in Darwin hardly dented our mood. Then I felt the first rumbling in my guts. The Malaysian water was coming back to haunt me. Anyone who has travelled on a C130 will know of the tin surrounded by a curtain, perched up by the tail that passes for the heads. By the time we got to Darwin some 10-12 hours later I was intimately familiar with it and by arse and other bits were frozen from being bared for so long.
On arrival in Darwin, while the others went to the mess for yet more beer,I went to the sickbay and got some pills from a sympathetic scablifter. These helped somewhat but the final 6 hour leg to Sydney was still uncomfortable. At least my misfortune provided some ongoing amusement for my shipmates.
Arriving at RAAF Richmond on the outskirts of Sydney we were surprised to find out transport waiting for us. I held out long enough to get to my place, bolted up the stairs, pushed past the missus and just made the heads. My wife still talks about this homecoming.
I still blame the crabs for being the root cause of all this!
