The best 'dear john' letter ever

Discussion in 'The Corps' started by brazenhussy, May 13, 2007.

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  1. A Marine stationed in Afghanistan recently received a "Dear John" letter from his girlfriend back home. It read as follows:

    Dear Ricky,

    I can no longer continue our relationship. The distance between us is just too great. I must admit that I have cheated on you twice, since you've been gone, and it's not fair to either of us. I'm sorry. Please return the picture of me that I sent to you.

    Love, Becky

    The Marine, with hurt feelings, asked his fellow Marines for any snapshots they could spare of their girlfriends, sisters, ex-girlfriends, aunts, cousins etc. In addition to the picture of Becky, Ricky included all the other pictures of the pretty girls he had collected from his buddies.

    There were 57 photos in that envelope....along with this note:

    Dear Becky,

    I'm so sorry, but I can't quite remember who you are. Please take your picture from the pile, and send the rest back to me.

    Take Care, Ricky
  2. Fabulous.

    Groucho Marks once said:

    Always remember, a woman is only a woman, but a cigar is a bloody good smoke.



  4. Thats almost as old as me !!!!!

    Still funny though
  5. What about:

    'Dear John, Happy Fathers Day!'

    See if he returns your call then?? :twisted:
  6. sgtpepperband

    sgtpepperband War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    Sent my mate on deployment a maily once (s'okay, we weren't gay or owt!). Anyway I changed my handwriting a little so he didn't know who it was from, and wrote in big letters across the back of the envelope:

    "I missed my period last month"! :twisted:
  7. Greendeath, it might have been said by Groucho, but it was written by Rudyard Kipling and was based on a real life breach of promise case!!
  8. I am deffo gonna try that!
  9. In those lost lost days before I met my missus, we used to pin all the "Dear John's" to the notice board in the mess, it was a kind of trophy
  10. Expecting a Dear paddlequack then? =)

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