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I was being stalked by some kraut bird years ago, a quick "he died" letter from a sympathetic shipmate did the trick. Oh the glorious days before mobile phones and email, when going offshore meant going out of contact apart from the odd letter drop. A simpler time when you could leave personal issues at the jetty and concentrate on being a professional.
dont get me started on lads and mobile phones. the old days to me meant 2 12 minute phone calls a month. now we get the

"the ship is now in mobile phone range -

will all welfare cases drop everything there doing and cry to thier bird on the phone"

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