Should he wait?

Discussion in 'Joining Up - Royal Navy Recruiting' started by jannertoo, Oct 4, 2009.

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  1. Hello all,
    my son has only just turned 16 and wants to join the navy. I don't know if I'm just being an over protective mum but I think he is too young and should wait a few years.

    He has already done his entry test, interview, fitness test and medical and now just has to wait for a starting date. I think his careers officer said it would be about Feb/March next year.

    I think he should carry on with his education for a couple of years and then think about it again. He got good GCSE results which were A* A and B's in 12 subjects.

    I know he will be a lot safer in the navy compared to the army or marines but I am still not happy about him joining up.

    I have still got his consent form infront of me that I havn't had the heart to sign sign yet.

    What is your opinion on this?
  2. If he's got 180 UCAS points then why not suggest he tries the Officer route?
  3. Hello,

    Sorry to hear you are unsure about your son's decision to join the RN. My parents too are concerned about my decision to join (even though I am 21), and they are attempting to "talk me out of it". However, there are few people in this world who have a vision or goal and actually have the opportunity to chase it successfully. If your son has already passed the selection process and put the effort into his PT and PJFT etc then it seems he is committed to join. Surely you would like to see him in an job he is excited about and looking forward to with good prospects and a good future? He will make you proud, and he'll come back to you on leave a more mature and focused person Im sure. But he does need your support, and your blessing, however worried you are. 16 is very young, however it seems he has his heart set on the RN. He may resent you in years to come if you sucessfully persuade him not to go and he is stuck in a job he doesn't enjoy or whatever.

    I am fighting for my parents blessing, and they are coming round. Leaving to join the RN knowing they do not agree with my decision won't feel good. I want them to support me and hopefully be proud of me. He'll go to Raleigh feeling on top of the world if he knows his mum is proud of him for following his dream, even if he is young.
  4. I'd echo RO77, if he has leadership potential he should consider continuing with education (A Levels) and applying for a commission.
  5. My opinion is that it is a very young age to be starting out. I suppose it comes down to the individual concerned but I joined at 19 and it felt about right, some of the lads I joined with were 16 and, I have to say, struggled at times.

    He seems to have a good set of GCSE results though, so the obvious thing to do would be to carry on and get the A-levels for UCAS points with a view to officer entry as was stated before. Though, as we all know, trying to persuade a teenager of the 'best' thing to do is not the easiest thing in the world!

    I don't envy your position, can only take comfort in the fact that if he is dead set on it, he will make it and would be presented with some fantastic experiences and career opportunities.

    Good luck.
  6. Tell him to continue with his A levels in order to get the UCAS points needed for officer entry.
    In the meantime he can investigate all the options including getting a degree in a useful subject.
  7. It's all well and good, all of you saying he should join as an officer. Maybe the lad doesn't actually want to be an officer.

    Fcuk sake. Obviously being an officer has better prospects, but're all old cnuts anyway.
  8. Is he staying on at 6th form/college?
  9. Fair point (but less of the old..!), question is does he know the difference in terms of what his duties would be in either job?

    There are pros and cons to both routes, but some of the comments made on other threads about opinions and perspective changing with age and personal circumstance are very valid...

    (edited to add quote)
  10. As someone who joined the RN at 15 I can say the decision I made behind my fathers back was the best I have ever made.

    I did it as an act of rebellion for not allowing me my first choice which was to join the merchant marine as a navigation officer. As it transpired my rebellios move was in my view the best move I did.

    I have however held my fathers initial decision against him ever since.

    Don't let the feelings for your son cloud his career path for him. The navy will give him confidence and independance as well as a sound grounding in life.

    He will always be your son be he a sailor in todays modern RN or an architect somewhere.

    Nothing wrong with be protective but don't allow the feeling to drive him away.

    My two penneth.
  11. Zoid
    Not everyone is in your position where choice of job in the RN is limited by low intelligence and the inability to be able to achieve the high score which is required for the better trades. :p :oops: :lol: :lol:
  12. You have no idea why I dropped out of college so **** off you cnut.
  13. A parent has asked a serious question regards his sons future, I'm sure he doesn't want to hear your immature responses.
  14. Jannertoo

    It's only normal for a good parent to be concerned for the wellbeing of their offspring. As others have said, it would probably be better if your son was to continue in education and get the necessary qualifications and join as an officer. The opportunites would be different and the earning potential far higher. However, if that's not what he wants to do and he has decided that he wants to join up now then it might not be a good idea to discourage him. Jen_M sums things up very nicely. Joining the RN would be the making of him. He will mature quite quickly and see and experience things around the world that most lads his age couldn't dream of. You are naturally worried for his safety but in all honesty you needn't be. Each and every one of us faces risk the moment we leave the house, some without leaving it, and you can't wrap kids up in cotton wool forever. When you stand there at his passing-out parade you will indeed be proud as punch.

    Fcuk off Zoidberg, you know nothing.
  15. They're not immature. Slim had a pop, maybe it was just banter...I don't know. I bit you goodbye from this thread.

    One last thing though, it's his life and at 16 I'm sure he can't make decisions like that with full understanding. Maybe going to the AFCO with him and talking to both his careers advisor and your son will help.
  16. It's perhaps worth reflecting on why you want him to wait a few years. The messages coming across from this post are confused, you give three different reasons; safety, potential and age.

    From my perspective, the first thing I'd ask is why he wants to go in now, rather than wait. If he has no aspirations for A levels and then University then why force it, if he's not motivated then he'll potentially crash out anyway, that said it looks as if he's got some credible academic potential so could seriously investigate A levels.

    We can't know the future, clearly several are saying categorically one thing or the other, but I would strip it back to motivation and likelihood of success.

    Clearly there are financial benefits to staying at school and then trying to get in as an officer, although I would caution that many who are academically able may be completely unsuitable for a commission or have no interest in it, the job of an officer is very different and I know several who have become very demotivated because it wasn't what they wanted.

    All that said, whilst he may struggle to keep up the pace there is a lot in the RN for him to gain from.

    We can't know the future.

    Whose fears and ambitions are you concentrating on, yours or his?
  17. witsend

    witsend War Hero Book Reviewer

    I see young dim has been on the Sunday afternoon sauce.

    There was a thread not so long ago that ran along similar line's, and if my memory serves me right, ran into pages of people's opinion on this. Maybe someone could find it and post a link for the mother to read.
  18. I agree someone should find it.
  19. Too right.
  20. (granny)

    (granny) Book Reviewer

    I think that you are lucky to have a son who has knuckled down and made a good start in his education. He also seems to have a certain determination that I never had at his age. As parents, and in my case a grandparent, I wish that my Grandson, who is 17, had his maturity. It will do him no harm to join the RN and he will probably gain a great deal. 16 seems a bit young but it's better to support him by letting him make this mature decision. I'm sure that he will make you proud. The best of luck to him. You've got to let him go sometime. Good luck with your decision.

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