Lantern Swinger
I remember working on strictly in 2010 as a professional dancer, I fell with my partner and ended up having an awful gash on my head....
Ann Widdecombe's


Lantern Swinger
A phone rings.... Woman answers.... Pervert breathes heavily....."have you got a tight unshaven ****?" Woman replies "yes...... He's watching the TV, who shall I say is calling?"

Paddy gets arrested for beating his wife The judge asks "why do you keep beating her" Paddy replies "I think it's my weight advantage, longer reach and superior footwork.

As a veterinary pathologist I was asked to a job at London zoo and I must admit because of the fire it was almost impossible to compare the meerkat.

Fancy a night out next Friday ????? A Charity Disco for women born without legs !!! The place will be crawling with fanny.
I remember it as if it was only yesterday, walking out of that room with
tears streaming from my eyes.
"It's a boy!" I cried.
"It's a boy!"

I am never going to Thailand on holiday again......ever.


Lantern Swinger
heard last night
wife to husband at party

w -that man over there said he wanted to kiss my firm tits
h - what ! I'll kill him
w - he then said he wanted to kiss each of my arse cheeks
h - that's it I'm going to take him apart
w - he then said he was going to tip me upside down and drink lager from my fanny

h - whoa, hang on, I'm not going up against someone who can drink as much as that.......................

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