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Shopping, Chavs and a Cull.

Blackrat

War Hero
Moderator
Book Reviewer
I fucking hate it. Unless it involves books, music or porn. The misses on the other hand, loves to shop. For anything. When she mentions that we should go to the shops together, i pop smoke and disappear quicker than a redneck caught hanging out the back of a piggy.

As you can imagine, now every fucker and their dog is out shopping for bloody christmas, i'm starting to lose the plot. You can't even get a coffee because of fuckwits trying to decide if they prefer the Gingerbread Latte or the Machiato Tagnut Surprise.

However, is it me or are there more chavs out and about at this time of year? As if the shops are not painful enough, i have to view their shit dress sense and listen to their fucked up speech. We need a cull to control the numbers of these vermin. Suggestions please good people.
 

sgtpepperband

War Hero
Book Reviewer
Blackrat said:
..unless it involves books, music or porn...

Hold on, BR - the music and porn thing I understand. But are you expecting us to believe that you are a 'reader'? :? :twisted:
 

2_deck_dash

War Hero
It's really quite simple, you must look to yourself for the answers.

Clearly you are venturing into areas that are populated by chavery, ask yourself why you are doing this? If perhaps you did your Christmas shopping (or better still paid your man to do it for you) at Selfridges, or in an emergency Harrods, you wouldn't encounter any scumbag untermench.

It sounds to me like you are spending too much time around poor people, I know it can be fun sometimes, but at this time of year it's not safe, many of them have TB.

During the Christmas period I find it very unwise to venture out of the safe confines of Belgravia or my estate, you should consider doing the same.
 

bikerman

War Hero
BR the interweb thingy is fantastic do all your shopping online and get Chimbo delivered simpuls. That way you don't have to mix with unwashed chav scum.
 

Blackrat

War Hero
Moderator
Book Reviewer
2DD makes sense, but i like to immerse myself sometimes in the foulness of common folk.
 

WreckerL

War Hero
Super Moderator
Zyklon B pellets placed in the ventilation system of the local Primark/Lidl's will clear the area of most chav's. Some innocent bystanders may get caught but some collateral damage is to be expected.

For a mass cull, the sales are the best time. No good for this Chrimbo but next year will exceptional.
 
2_deck_dash said:
whastie said:
please enlighten us in the colonies,what is a chav?i presume it or they are unpleasant.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chav

I see this piece of wikicrap still peddles the term 'Chav' is from / about residents of Chatham in Kent .
Of all the years I spent in RNSS Pembroke, I never heard this term applied to anyone :scratch: - and I was born and lived in Gillingham !
I suppose it could be said that 'Dog****' is a term for people from Pompey, as that seems to be a term alluded to for the City of Pompey within these hallowed fora !
What's the term for someone from Guzz these days ..... :wink:
 

trelawney126

War Hero
whitemouse said:
2_deck_dash said:
whastie said:
please enlighten us in the colonies,what is a chav?i presume it or they are unpleasant.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chav

I see this piece of wikicrap still peddles the term 'Chav' is from / about residents of Chatham in Kent .
Of all the years I spent in RNSS Pembroke, I never heard this term applied to anyone :scratch: - and I was born and lived in Gillingham !
I suppose it could be said that 'Dog****' is a term for people from Pompey, as that seems to be a term alluded to for the City of Pompey within these hallowed fora !
What's the term for someone from Guzz these days ..... :wink:


You have my sympathy :wink:
 
trelawney126 said:
whitemouse said:
2_deck_dash said:
whastie said:
please enlighten us in the colonies,what is a chav?i presume it or they are unpleasant.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chav

I see this piece of wikicrap still peddles the term 'Chav' is from / about residents of Chatham in Kent .
Of all the years I spent in RNSS Pembroke, I never heard this term applied to anyone :scratch: - and I was born and lived in Gillingham !
I suppose it could be said that 'Dog****' is a term for people from Pompey, as that seems to be a term alluded to for the City of Pompey within these hallowed fora !
What's the term for someone from Guzz these days ..... :wink:


You have my sympathy :wink:

I agree totally with you ... now !

When I lived there it was a nice quiet town (if you forgot 36 Engineer Regt in Brompton, and the Devon & Dorsets as was !! - mind you, the Ghurkas were okay ...smart, well dressed etc and definitely not carrying kukris about ;) )
THEN, they shut the Naval Barracks, shut all the good pubs, amalgamated the Towns into one (Yuk !!) ... and the rest, they say, is history ...... :(

:)
 
Normally I would just avoid the 1st shopping weekend after pay day because after that they've generally spent all their "hard earned" readies. This time of year however all bets are off because, clearly, they are currently spending on credit cards, overdrafts etc. Indeed some of them are still trying to pay for what they spent this time last year. However as they are generally feckless and stupid this does not stop them repeating last years mistakes. We then have the problem of the unemployed, who have an endless revenue stream courtesy of us taxpayers; they can therefore go shopping whenever they wish. Ultimately some sort of "ethnic cleansing" is probably the way forward. :D
 

Waspie

War Hero
bikerman said:
BR the interweb thingy is fantastic do all your shopping online and get Chimbo delivered simpuls. That way you don't have to mix with unwashed chav scum.

I'm with bikerman on this one.

And as far as the chav cull is concerned, yup, that too gets my vote, nothing too humane though!
 

BillyNoMates

War Hero
Plymouth locals get a little upset, when they discover there's
only ONE packet of Jammie Wagon Wheels left for sale in the
Pound Shop. It's the thought that counts isn't it?

 
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