Sex with Animals


Just read the above story and have come to the conclusion that some filthy fcuker has been using a carp as a sperm receptacle. hence the human/fishlike offspring. Have any forum users ever 'cross pollinated' with a member of the animal kingdom and if so what did the result look like? The only instance of man/animal sex I can recall is the time an AB SSM told me about the time him and his mate found a dead porpoise washed up on the beach when they were kids and poked a plastic banana (a la 1970's greengrocers window display) up it's arse out of curiosity. Tsst! Kids eh?

PS: You know who you are AB Reid!!!
I was offered €100 to shag a dockyard mongrel dog in Soudha bay but I couldn't catch it.

Other than that just Cornish birds from Trelawneys are as close as I've got.
I've just remembered another lad (funnily enough he was also an AB SSM....what is it with these cnuts?) who told me about the time he 'manually stimulated' his dog to completion whilst watching telly as a young boy. Apparently Fido was lying on his back having his belly rubbed by said lad who was using his foot to stroke the dog, out came the lipstick and one thing led to another. I believe he's a member of Hartlepools finest constabulary now.

PS: You know who you are....AB Watt


Lantern Swinger
Lad I used to work with, one summer Sunday morning decided to sit on the patio in his dressing gown. Felt a peculiar but nice feeling around his gonads and on looking down saw his Cairn Terrier licking away!
Now if this wasn't bad enough, he saw nothing wrong in confessing that he let the dog finish him off..!
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