Â· If you're too open minded, your brains will fall out. Â· Age is a very high price to pay for maturity. Â· Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, if he gets angry, he'll be a mile away - and barefoot. Â· Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you a mechanic. Â· Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity. Â· A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. Â· A closed mouth gathers no feet. Â· If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before. Â· My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance. Â· I have found at my age going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of my face. Â· If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip. Â· Always yield to temptation, because it may not pass your way again. Â· Bills travel through the postal system at twice the speed of cheques. Â· A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good. Â· Eat well, stay fit, die anyway. Â· Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it. Â· No husband has ever been shot while doing the dishes.