Random thoughts

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous' started by janner, Feb 11, 2011.

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  1. janner

    janner War Hero Book Reviewer














    "I am not available right now, but



    Thank you for caring enough to call.



    I am making some changes in my life.



    Please leave a message after the



    Beep. If I do not return your call,



    You are one of the changes."






    **************************************************








    A small Boy wrote to Santa Claus," send me a brother."



    Santa wrote back, "SEND ME YOUR MOTHER."



    **************************************************








    What is the definition of Mistress?



    Someone between the Mister and Mattress.



    **************************************************








    What's the difference between stress, tension and panic?*



    Stress is when wife is pregnant,*



    Tension is when girlfriend is pregnant,*



    and Panic is when both are pregnant.*



    **************************************************








    A woman asks man who is traveling with six children,



    "Are all these kids yours?"*



    The man replies, "No, I work in a condom factory and these



    are customer complaints".



    **************************************************








    A young boy asks his Dad, "What is the difference between confident and confidential?"*



    Dad says, "You are my son, I'm confident about that.



    Your friend over there, is also my son, that's confidential."



    **************************************************








    A three-year-old boy was examining his testicles while taking a bath.



    Mom" he asked, "are these my brains?"



    "Not yet," she replied.
     

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