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Punishment for thieves?

Rachelthree

War Hero
Well I have just had my bag stolen- it had my i phone, bank card, ID, house keys and so forth in it- now whilst the technical term for this scenario seen as though I live near no family etc is 'fooked'; feel free to make up some scenarios etc in which the thief gets their commupence to cheer me up a little!
 

Rachelthree

War Hero
Yep, good old classy pompey! I am not too materialistic but it kinda sucks seeing as though I can't get into my house, phone anyone, get any money out to travel anywhere or do anything, and I am currently at someones house I dont know too well borrowing their sofa and computer- good job I am not too much of a moaner or I would have a field day! Sympathy or laughter is equally welcome, both are good for the soul apparently!

PS I am aware this post sounds moany, its more for light relief :p albeit a bit self indulgent and wallowing!
 

tiddlyoggy

War Hero
Book Reviewer
Yep, good old classy pompey! I am not too materialistic but it kinda sucks seeing as though I can't get into my house, phone anyone, get any money out to travel anywhere or do anything, and I am currently at someones house I dont know too well borrowing their sofa and computer- good job I am not too much of a moaner or I would have a field day! Sympathy or laughter is equally welcome, both are good for the soul apparently!

PS I am aware this post sounds moany, its more for light relief :p albeit a bit self indulgent and wallowing!
Taking it quite well I reckon. I'd be looking for the nearest bastard to murder! What pub then, do you know? Never had any of our lads/lasses robbed in my last draft there.
 

Rachelthree

War Hero
Taking it quite well I reckon. I'd be looking for the nearest bastard to murder! What pub then, do you know? Never had any of our lads/lasses robbed in my last draft there.

somewhere albert rd way :( its happened to me before at a cashpoiny but i managed to retrieve it back straight away luckily"

haha rumrat, if you give me my house keys I'll even help you use it ;)
 

janner

MIA
Book Reviewer
You need to very quickly get access to your address and get the locks changed, if its not already to late. If your current address and not your parents address is on the licence or other paperwork they probably went straight around and helped themselves.
 

trelawney126

War Hero
You need to very quickly get access to your address and get the locks changed, if its not already to late. If your current address and not your parents address is on the licence or other paperwork they probably went straight around and helped themselves.
You certainly know how to cheer up people Jan!
 

janner

MIA
Book Reviewer
Seen it happen so many times in my old job mate, quite often the keys are the main concern and the thieves are around to the address before people know the keys have been stolen. Just trying to make the young lady aware of possible problems
 

Rumrat

War Hero
somewhere albert rd way :( its happened to me before at a cashpoiny but i managed to retrieve it back straight away luckily"

haha rumrat, if you give me my house keys I'll even help you use it ;)

So if I give you your house key back you will help me use it?
You not being very materialistic would then not have a problem taking off all your kit and giving it to me, correct?
Jeeze this thread is getting interesting.
:eye:
The saving grace is I am not sharkey. With him the minute you stripped, he'd be in your clothes and mincing about in the town in minutes. Many a woman was witness to, and shocked by Sharkey's take on "I want to get in your knickers".^~
 

Waspie

War Hero
If you know you serial number of your iPhone and have access to a iPad/Mac then you can track and disable the iPhone.

That would get me smiling knowing the thieving twat's chance of some wonga had just gone fizzzzz!
 

Rumrat

War Hero
If you know you serial number of your iPhone and have access to a iPad/Mac then you can track and disable the iPhone.

That would get me smiling knowing the thieving twat's chance of some wonga had just gone fizzzzz!


I wudda shared, but not now.
Why do you need to meddle?
 

Sharkey

Banned
somewhere albert rd way :( its happened to me before at a cashpoiny but i managed to retrieve it back straight away luckily"

haha rumrat, if you give me my house keys I'll even help you use it ;)

I can narrow that down a bit if Rummers nicked it, you were either in an over 60s tranny bar, a home for the bewildered or behind some bushes in the park
 

Rumrat

War Hero
I can narrow that down a bit if Rummers nicked it, you were either in an over 60s tranny bar, a home for the bewildered or behind some bushes in the park

They seek him here,
They seek him there,
They seek the Rumrat everywhere,
But unlike Sharkey,
He feels no pain
Unimpeded by a walking frame,
So fuck of sharkey, and stow you're shite,
You half witted, senile, transvestite..
 

Sharkey

Banned
Is he in heaven
or is he in hell
or in a pompey coppers cell
he nicked a bag off Rachael3
it'll be a while before he's free
they caught him in young Rachael's place
with her makeup on his face
in her high heels bra and nicks
sadlly thats the way he gets his kicks
he nicked her bag in search of plunder
lets hope they send him back down under
 

Rumrat

War Hero
Is he in heaven
or is he in hell
or in a pompey coppers cell
he nicked a bag off Rachael3
it'll be a while before he's free
they caught him in young Rachael's place
with her makeup on his face
in her high heels bra and nicks
sadly that's the way he gets his kicks
he nicked her bag in search of plunder
lets hope they send him back down under

None of what you say is true,
We know it was all down to you,
You robbed the girl it wasn't right,
And all to be a transvestite,
Mincing round in women's clothes,
Getting up poor red mist's nose,
This fetish you should put aside,
Or sharkey you'll end up inside,
Your choice of life is quite disgusting
And lots of folk who have been trusting,
in you are now all having doubts,
and hope that you and similar louts,
Are transported across the sea,
but please dear lord just not by me.
Send him where there's massive bars,
Or better send the cunt to mars.
Send him god and make it soon,
He'll be the first on mars to moon.
He'll flash his little frilly knickers,
Suspenders, and like Catholic vicars,
He'll get kicks and perverted joys,
from shagging poor tight virgin boys.
 

0G1N

Lantern Swinger
Hey up look it poets corner
Rumrat Sharkey order, order
But what the latest on the girl,
who's day did not start so well
has she sorted all her woes
or are we saying fuck it
 
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