creakin said:wompingwillow said:to stay of topic
No I let him see her when ever he wants, at the end of the day what right do I have to denigh my daughter her father no matter what a prick he's been to me, he's still her dad.
I don't consider myself a nag bag, studied sports science at uni, qualified fitness instructor etc, and pride myself in trying to look the best I can. I have no intention of becoming bitter and twisted towards men or bringing my daughter up to feel the same.
But so many women do again I get tarred with that brush. I think it's completely fucked up when women are able to stop their child from seeing their dad, the only time this should be considered is if the dads a twat and abusive.
Its no good for the child, OK I don't particaly like the bloke, but why should my own selfishness stop my child from having another set of grandparents, uncles, aunts etc.
It should be made so much more easier not just for dads but for other members of the child's family to go through the courts to get access and the mother should be punished if they don't ahear to the access visits
Just my opion I'll get off me high horse
Your reply has restored some confidence back in me that not all relationships destroy a childs family ties. If the child when its older 18ish then decides that its dad is a complete waste of time, then fair do's, could also go the other way of course - like dad and bin the mum(for being a bitch and not allowing access to dad). Could I give you my sons ex girlfriends details so you can have a chat ????
thats my main point what right do I have to decide if my child should see someone who had a 50% say in her being formed, at the end of the day we didn't work. Not through lack of trying on ether part.
Sadly to many women go ahead with pregnancy now a days to become martyrs to the course, they want to feel special ; and feel the best way is to be intelligent, successful and bring up a child single handily, sadly this also works for women who are less socially, intelligent and work related better off.
They still think having a child now nowadays makes you different from everyone else, and until the government sorts out their unfriendly family tax, benefit and work laws this is always going to be the same.
Yes having a child is amazing, but having a child that has two loving parents, who ether live together or apart is most important. I knew that my child was better off having me and my ex living apart because together we were like argumentative kids.
I can safely say he's one of the best friends I've ever had now and we have been known to spend hours on the phone chatting. Maybe I've just grown up emotionally since having my child I don't know?
I'd gladly chat to any mum who thinks it's right to cut off the father from their child's life, and have ranted to others at playgroup on this subject. I've never involved solicitors or the like to get involved, and feel the only women who do this should stop watching so much Trisha!
As for my comments yes I put them in a public forum and hopefully thous from this site who have got to know me know I put them on as a means to start a health debate and full expect god knows how much abuse in reply.
Frankly it's water of a ducks back. I'm fairly young looking for my age, I'll never forget being allowed a chair at work, when asked by a mature lady why, I replied because I was pregnant. She then looked down her nose at me and said, well you'll never get a boyfriend now will you, you should have got rid of why you had the chance, tat full of what!
Yes I'm sat on my arse now but give me a year and no disrespect to any of you I will probably be earning twice as much of you. As I attend to find work as ( after post grad study) ether a physio or a podiatrist.
At the end of the day like I said in an earlier post, I've taken time out to teach my child all the basics and without putting pressure on the child, because of this give her a better chance of also making something good out of her life.