Phantom Poo

Well just been and cracked a huge poo out, and upon rising to wipe to my amazement it had disappeared?

Any other instances of the Phantom poo? ottytrain5:

 

Nope but i've heard your full of shit!!! :wink: :wink:

 

I watch mine to make sure the fcukers get out. Occasionally they do shoot straight around the bend.

 

Not anymore

 

There have been times, when constipated, I have had to dig mine out with a stick.

 

Seems abit drastic, whatever works for you

While on topic, recently had piles, not a pretty sight, nor a comftable one, constipation simply got the better of me.

 

Gas and air does it for me and a big push at the end.

Cant see what all the fuss is about giving birth.

Expecting incoming and going deep. :!:

 

Talking about turds, has anyone else noticed that white dog turds are never seen ( or trod in ) these days

 

Turds.....such great fun.

We'd have longest turd competitions in Norway, artic compo makes you regular, every third day whether you want to or not. So we'd see who could crack out the longest unbroken one. Some smart arrse crapped in a bag then piped his name in the snow.

 

I have had mine brown, black, yellow, green, red and even blue

 

And the folded toilet paper technique used to finish off. Deep deep joy

 

The other colours I can relate to but blue? how'd you manage that one? 8O

 

OMG. I thought some of the other threads were bad, but this tops it- I think i'd rather hear your derogatory jokes about women than about this!!

 

So I suppose that a Blow Job is out of the question then?

 

Hig.... Haven't I heard this offer before in another thread?!

 

lol I was only messing with the blue! I suppose owt is better than nowt... constipation is not fun nor diarrhoea, had some nasty accident over xmas with not reaching the toilet in time at my families house party and cannot remember anything so embarrassing in my life!

 

More than likely, but, if you don`t ask you don`t get, so, is a Blow Job out of the question?

 

Did you keep the biggest one to compare all challengers against? I swear the tour champion down the Falklands was as long as my forearm.

 

Well wouldn't like to divulge such matters on a public forum- so you'll have to keep on wishing.. :wink:

 

So there is a chance then? For a meeting at your own convenience, ring me on 01478 983641, and leave your message after the tone.