Perving....we've all done it.

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by Rumrat, Jun 10, 2010.

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  1. So tell us about your perv exploits, intentional or otherwise. I've had a few as a taxi driver, and in other situations. They can be fun, erotic or downright embarrassing.

    I had just left the Andrew and took a job as a security guard as the job I was going into didn't start for seven weeks.
    I was in the loading bay of a firm in Brum, and the doors were shut.
    It was a Saturday night, and as I was about to punch the security clock by the outside door I could hear a pair of voices in the door recess on the street. It was a lad about 15/17ish and his pash.
    He was pleading with her to go over the park and do a turn.
    From what I could gather it would be the first time they were to do it.
    She was quite undecided about the adventure, but he was not entirely on a looser, as he grovelled quite well and seemed to be making ground, to the extent she may well have said yes within the next two or three minutes.
    However I had not got time to listen anymore so decided that if I was getting fuck all he was getting the same.
    I am the thickness of a steel roller door away from them so I suddenly piped up, "For fuck sake spread your legs gal and we can all be on our way"
    There was a shriek, followed by running high heals, followed by threats to kill, maim and haunt me forever.
    I wonder if he copt off?
    When I left the building there was no one about. :D :D :D :D
  2. Have you thought of taking up "dogging" for a hobby? 8)
  3. Between 75-77, I shared a cabin on the Hecla with a Pomem(M) and we were on a detached survey in the Med for 9 months. Everywhere we stopped, the stoker tried to trap without a great deal of success until we hit Alexandria.

    We had a Saturday night thrash and have found some assorted clacker from various sources and after plying a gremlin all night, the stoker sidled over to me and asked for the cabin key as he had trapped.

    Giving him 10 minutes to delag, myself and the CPO(H) crept around to the cabin flat and looking through the keyhole could see a big white ass hammering away like a donkey boiler. Grabbing a fire extinguisher, we pointed the nozzle at the keyhole and let rip for 10 seconds......

    and then ran like David fcuking Hemery.
  4. I have fond memories of standing on the gangway in Incheon, South Korea at 3am counting the drunken sailors home. The gate at Incheon is down a long road and you can see people coming home for miles. The QM and I had great fun guessing who was walking towards us and then identifying them with the binoculars as they came into view.

    Anyway as the last few staggered home we noticed that a particular wren and a particular lad were still ashore. We guessed that they were obviously bagging off and waited for them to return. After hours of waiting we spotted two lonely figures returning through the gate and watched them come closer with the bins. Suddenly they stopped and hid behind a pile of railway sleepers, shielding them from the gate but in full view of us with the binoculars.

    The QM and I then spent the next 10 minutes fighting over the bins as we watched this wren being pounded to fcuk over the pile of railway sleepers. As they returned onboard I gave them both a cheeky nod and the QM gently tapped the bins that were hanging around his neck.

    Good times.
  5. You meant to say "when did you start dogging" didn't you?
    Its a great hobby, but can bring you to your knees 8O :roll:
  6. Stood watching a woman getting it all which way and any with my oppo.

    I was at the time in a block of flats in Sheffield with another oppo who we had all gone up homers with (6 of us)
    We was watching the performance taking place below us in a car with the roof open so although not a perfect view, enough to see most of the action.
    Turned fuckin awkward when the said oppo got out with the bird who turned out to be the mum of the lad we was stopping with.
    The ensuing fight was nasty, two broken ribs and a broken nose before we could get them parted.
    We all got slung out and spent the night on the railway station.
    Lost a good oppo as well as he blamed all of us.
  7. I should think so too.Fancy giving yer mates mother one and then breaking her ribs.A bit harsh I say.Fcukin good slap would have done the trick :D
  8. I have fond memories of sitting on my BMX bike as a 9 year old, under a large window in a block of flats while a young couple inside went at it like the clappers.

    The window was the angled kind that is hinged horizontally in the middle. This meant that when the window was open it acted as a perfect mirror reflecting the image of the couples bed and whatever was going on atop the bed at the time.

    Large crowds of us used to form and just sit there transfixed by the couple's antics, I'm sure they knew we were there but didn't seem too bothered.

  9. Typical dabbers, if it had been stokers we would have laffed like fcuk AND remained oppo's.
  10. Yorkie_ _ _ _ Was a stoker and so was pearly white. :wink:
  11. Stokers mixing with Dabbers :?: :D
  12. On the only occasion they stuck us in ROOKE, 1974.
    . Sitting outside the bar, watching the sunset, one of the lads felt a bit queasy, so went to the sea wall to throw up. Comes back, holding his finger to his lips in a plea for silence. Sneak up to the wall, look over, and there's a chef in whites, getting a blow job from one of the local Jennies. As he's getting to the vinegar stroke, a dozen submariners leap up and burst into loud applause, and numerous offers of advice. Exit Jenny BJ with a mild attack of hysterics, whilst poor Cookie Boy is left there twitching and wriggling, wondering what's gone wrong. As we left, he was helpfully informed "She's fcuked of mate - you might as well have a J Arfur".
  13. I like this....might even come back for more :D

    Earliest memories of perving (apart from hanging around WM Clubs on a Sunday afternoon and peering through the curtains into the stripper show) was back in early 70's as a 10 y/o and drilling a hole in bathroom wall through to my bedroom.... Just so I could spy on my uncles new bird that used to stay with us. Fekcing essence she was and I really needed to see her pert points. A stereotypical french looking girl with dark complexion and short dark hair

    Then my mam saw this tiny hole right in the middle of a flower in the wallpaper over the bath and kicked the sh1te out of me!!

    But god it was worth it... :tongue9:
  14. I did something similar when I was thirteen.
    Cupboard doors in the old days used to have three vent holes about the size of a two pence piece, about two thirds up.
    I hid with my mate in the walk in cupboard in his sisters bedroom, she was about 16 and divs in a slutty way.
    I had to stand on a box to see through the holes, and I was leaning forwards to make sure I missed nothing.
    I fell forwards, the door burst open and I was kneeling on the floor where I fell about three feet from her full frontal nude body.
    She promptly kicked me in the nuts and head and walked over casually and got into bed.
    She then told me to get the fuck out and turn the light out on the way. Her last words were "Dirty little fucker" but I saw it all. :D :D :roll:
  15. They were 'all' fekcing essence when you are only 10 years old.

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