Overheard in the RN...

P2000

Lantern Swinger
#1
From: Overheard in New York

Teen girl on cell: So, I ended up giving him head in a closet at Allie's party. Am I a skank? Yes. Do I care? No.

--Starbucks

Chick on cell: I have casual, meaningless sex. It's what I do. It's like a cornerstone of my life... Yeah, so why is he calling me to tell me what he's buying at the grocery store? It's like, 'Call your fucking girlfriend for that.'

--E 93rd & 2nd

So, as it's Friday, anyone got any similar lines from the Mob?

And closing down to Zulu Alpha is only funny in the right context...
 
#2
When I was in basic training many moons ago a wren was asked by her divisional chief why she joined the Navy like he asked everyone. Her response was and this is gen "Too get as much cock as I can" lol
 
#3
Not really heard, but on one of our bomber patrols a young OM(TSM) had a familygram from his mum containing the immortal line: "your Granny's had her back doors kicked in".
 

security_geek

Lantern Swinger
#4
On the same lines, heard on the bridge during a long night watch. Discussion going on between the bridge staff about the increase in burglary and generally putting the world to rights (as you do). Conversation rolls round to have you been a 'victim of crime'. The Female OOW dives into the conversation with 'its terrible I got home and found out someone had kicked my back doors in'. QM fell of his chair, Signalman excused himself to check the light stowages, 2nd OOW had a 'polite' coughing fit. The Female OOW realised what she had said and spent rather a longtime behind the curtain doing the charts, she took no further part in the conversations that watch.
 
#5
security_geek said:
On the same lines, heard on the bridge during a long night watch. Discussion going on between the bridge staff about the increase in burglary and generally putting the world to rights (as you do). Conversation rolls round to have you been a 'victim of crime'. The Female OOW dives into the conversation with 'its terrible I got home and found out someone had kicked my back doors in'. QM fell of his chair, Signalman excused himself to check the light stowages, 2nd OOW had a 'polite' coughing fit. The Female OOW realised what she had said and spent rather a longtime behind the curtain doing the charts, she took no further part in the conversations that watch.
LoL :thumright:
 

ronalder

Lantern Swinger
#6
security_geek said:
On the same lines, heard on the bridge during a long night watch. Discussion going on between the bridge staff about the increase in burglary and generally putting the world to rights (as you do). Conversation rolls round to have you been a 'victim of crime'. The Female OOW dives into the conversation with 'its terrible I got home and found out someone had kicked my back doors in'. QM fell of his chair, Signalman excused himself to check the light stowages, 2nd OOW had a 'polite' coughing fit. The Female OOW realised what she had said and spent rather a longtime behind the curtain doing the charts, she took no further part in the conversations that watch.
Current affairs Q and A session, sixties, chaired by very young subbie.
" Ok, , what would you chaps do if you won a fortune on the football pools?"
Bored three badger in the back row " Buy another Navy and fight this one!"
 
#7
tommo said:
When I was in basic training many moons ago a wren was asked by her divisional chief why she joined the Navy like he asked everyone. Her response was and this is gen "Too get as much cock as I can" lol
Can't fault her honesty :thumright:
 

Sparrowhawk01

Lantern Swinger
#8
When life bouy spooks got binned and the upper scupper was the out of bounds over night a young female OOW piped " Darken ship, darken ship, the upper deck is out of bounds to all personnel until 0700 tomorrow morning. Anyone wishing to proced onto the upperdeck must first go through the OOW" well the offers rang in all watch!