All you old salts will probably have heard this one but it's really for the benefit of the younger troops. A 17 year old virgin falls for a hairy arsed old matelot and decides to marry him. Her mother is aghast and warns her "Be very carefull my dear, I hope you have a happy marriage, but remember, if he asks you to 'do it the other way' you must refuse". The girl and the matelot get married and all goes well for the first 12 months. One day she recalls her mother's words and being curious says to Jolly Jack, "Shall we do it the other way?" "What" says Jack, "And fill the house with bloody kids"!