Newbie's Navy.


War Hero
Come gather round lads and I'll tell you a tale,
Of my early days in the Navy,
Naive and raw when I walked in the door
There was me with old Tommo and Davey.

We jump off the train in Plymouth's fair town,
And was met by a man with a Tilly,
He said he was duty watch, and when he dropped us off,
My mate said that he talked fuckin silly.

Next came the PO, a right so and so,
said he was whats known as a joss-man,
As if I cared, I was right fuckin scared,
And I really did not give a toss man.

We was placed in a hut, that was made out of wood,
It wasn't that it wasn't homely,
It was clean warm and dry, we still wanted to cry,
Although in a crowd we were lonely.

Next morning at dawn tired and forlorn,
They gave us our breakfast, and money,
Then they gave us our kit, most of it didn't fit,
But we found that it all seemed so funny.

They taught us to Iron to wash and to clean,
They split us up into our classes,
Said if we were good, in a week that we could,
Go ashore if we all earned our passes.

They put me to train in a class in part one,
Six weeks of marching and drilling,
They said if I got through, made it into part two,
Then thats where we learned about killing.

With the leave in between in twelve weeks I got keen,
To learn my trade and be a seaman,
I trained day and night, and I learned how to fight,
Turned from civvy wimp into a he-man.

Then on my next leave I came up the line,
My old mates they seemed to be witless,
And although I tried, they were a thorn in my side,
To be honest they all bored me shitless.

So back for more training and then I was told,
You're joining a ship,.. fast as lightening,
Then luck was a beast, they flew me out east,
Straight into a whole lot of fighting.

I landed in singers and was sent straight away,
To acclimatise, and learn the layout,
By the end of the night,I was caught in a fight,
Didn't think that I would see the day out.

Fifteen and scared shitless they gave me a gun,
Said if anything comes that way then shoot it,
I stood most the night, desperate to Shiite,
I felt and looked like a right tit.

So back down to singers Cu's I was too young,
To fight there with those real hard cases,
Terror barracks was great, and I met up with my mate,
Took me ashore, showed me the places.

The New Paris bar downtown Sembawang,
**** I thought I'd landed in clover,
A leg over was cheap, back on board for a sleep,
Then back again and start right over.

A fast black to town, for just half a crown,
Could make strapping blokes turn to jelly,
As the driver turned round,.. to sell things you found,
Your trousers could get rather smelly.

There was never a place could light up a face,
Like Bugis street when rammed with totty,
On the old shelter roof, midi's gave us the proof,
They had humour and were not all just snotty.

This old hat of mine, I did many a time,
Stunk like an old three badge kipper,
Pissed as a fart, it near broke my heart,
I was caught in mid stride by the skipper.

At the table he said I could well end up dead,
He said don't be a fool give up drinking,
It was dear he told me and as an OD,
It really set my brain to thinking.

booze was real dear ashore down the town,
It set you back quite a few shilling,
So we all agreed to get us some weed,
And smoked that and sat about chilling.

I became a degenerate,
And had loads of fun, yes we had fun every day boy,
But on pussers pay, it was hard in the day,
So I was just a payday playboy.


War Hero
Nice one! I'm surprised you can remember all that, let alone put it to verse. Obviously rum suits you better than beer suits me :-D

I will now find out how to do one of those 'like' things, mainly to wind up the more grouchy Forum members :)


War Hero
Loved it. Will there be a second epic poem to continue telling us newbies you're career?

Subject to the rehabilitation of offenders disclosure act. Maybe.:laughing2:

However my gaydar is homing in on certain members who are worthy of a short epistle.:-D


War Hero
Subject to the rehabilitation of offenders disclosure act. Maybe.:laughing2:

However my gaydar is homing in on certain members who are worthy of a short epistle.:-D


It's a brilliant read, I might try and write a poem, it won't be as epic nor witty but it might alow me to open up my dark past..muahahahaha.