New Inclusion Officers for Diamond Lils!

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by HarryBosch, May 30, 2007.

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  1. Good News!

    I've been asked to pass on the news that Diamond Lils has acquired the resources to fund two counsellors from the Antipsychiatry Alliance. These former Inclusivity Officers will be available to dispense advice on any matter troubling RR members, no matter how large or small. It is envisaged that their expertise in all matters will be highly sought after, consequently any troubled member will be able to recieve only one reply each from our experts.


    Sister Josie and Brother Bacchus Blobs represent dichotomous views of the human psyche. Simply put, there are two dominant ways of talking and thinking about Sailors and Royal Marines which can in turn be understood in terms of images drawn from mythology. The two mythological images invoked by the seperate schools of thought represented by Sister Josie and Brother Bacchus are the Gods Apollo and Dionysus. Together our resident experts represent and proffer advice based upon their Apollonian and Dionysian understanding of Her Majesty's Royal Navy and Royal Marines.

    Sister Josie


    Sister Josie is from the Apollonian school and stands for light, truth, poetry and beauty and her therapeutic method begins from the proposition that baby sailors and baby booties leave Ganges, Raleigh and CTC as angelic, innnocent infants untainted by the world which they have recently entered. Sister Josie believes that having once been born good, baby sailors and marines are then corrupted and criminalized as 'unfit, promiscuous pissheads'. Sister Josie's aim is to assist the return of Rum Rationers to the state of innocence they once enjoyed. Sister Josie enjoys swimming, cycling, music, reading and pets.

    Brother Bacchus Blobs


    Brother Blobs (or Brother Bacchus) has been trained in the Dionsyian school of antipsychiatry. Named after the God of drinking, revelery and debauchery the Dionysian view of matelots and marines is that they are innately corrupt, evil, little bastards. According to this view wilful and impish civvies are drawn to Her Majesty's Forces like flies round a sundodgers arse whereupon they are transformed into primal, pleasure loving beasts who, demanding instant gratification, will dispense pain and anguish upon all things and persons that prevent their satiation. According to Brother Bacchus, the evil of the Freudian super-ego made manifest by Daily Orders, closing times and sexual mores act as cruel, unnecessary and oppresive obstacles to the naughty, wanton desires of the little imps which lie within each of us. Father Bacchus enjoys drinking, women, cigarettes, more drinking in that order.


    Problems of a personal or other nature may be posted immediately although Sister Josie and Brother Bacchus may be unable to reply until later this evening or tomorrow (31 May 2007) at the latest.

    Minor edit fro gash spellibg
  2. Mum, can I have a biscuit please?
  3. Erm, yes, my problem with this is that I don`t have problems. Is this a problem?
  4. Two differents schools of thought? Two different ways of thinking? Well, erm, I just wanted some advice on my split personality? ^_^;
  5. wet_blobby

    wet_blobby War Hero Moderator

    Biscuits are for wimps, real men eat kebabs.
  6. wet_blobby

    wet_blobby War Hero Moderator

    Need a problem? Go hold smileys hand, he comes with major problems.
  7. wet_blobby

    wet_blobby War Hero Moderator

    Split personality.....? pull yourself together woman.
  8. Dear Brother Bacchus,

    just a note of thanks for your reply to my request for advice, dated 31/5.
    Your simple and succint reply, was quite frankly, DIRECT!
    You will be please to know that, I have now pulled myself together and the medication the little man in the white coat gave me is now working a treat! :thumright:

    Ms A Pints.
  9. Medication ?? , where ?.
  10. are you sure its a bisciut your looking for.. maybe you need to sweeten your dispossition
  11. to deny you have a problem can itself be your problem
  12. Catty by name......
  13. are you sure pinta.... which one of you answered this.....
  14. Dear Sister Josie,
    It was AussieAngel who replied. She was at work in the middle of the night, when the rest of the populus was asleep. She was attending to the sick and infirmed, you would have been very proud of her.
    However, I am AussieDevil. Because AussieAngel has now finished night-duty and has the weekend to herself, she has suddenly changed. As AussieDevil, I am about to embark on a bottle of wine and possible debauchery, as per the Brother Bacchus model.
    Ms A Pints (aka AAngel/ADevil)
  15. Dear AussieDevil... im glad that you feel you can let your hair down and enjoy the pleasures of the bottle... but i feel it important that you allow
    AussieAngel the same delights.. Or i fear she may deside to work longer night shifts,, thus denning you the pleasures you so deeply desire..
  16. Dear Sister Josie,
    There's an ice-cube chance in hell that AussieAngel will desire to work longer night-duties! Thanks for the advice though.
    Love, AussieDevil.
  17. I am NOT a Schizophrenic....AND NEITHER AM I!!!!
    WHO SAID THAT??!! I've been to both the North
    and South I guess that makes me Bi-polar...
    NO I'M NOT!!!.....Shut the F**K up and eat these
    Stanley Knife Blades!!! I'll
    show you what happens when a person cuts his
    own THUMBS off with a pair of pruning shears....
    giggle giggle.....shit! you can only do one..can't
    hold the shears any more...mutter mutter.
  18. Did someone mention Jaffa cakes and hot, sweet, rum laced kye, with just a dash of Bluebell, fresh from a well polished (off?) fanny?

    Dear Bacchus,

    Where can I find the mischievous sailor of my dreams and will he come pre-clad in black leather.....?

    Yours dartily and somewhat confused,

    Billy Nozzer.
  19. wet_blobby

    wet_blobby War Hero Moderator

    Darling Billy,

    You ain't been in the harbour lights recently then? The womb of the unformed Jack, you can get anything you want in there.

    Good hunting,

  20. wet_blobby

    wet_blobby War Hero Moderator

    Take the knife in your right hand, turn your left palm skyward, cut your left wrist diagonaly from the stem of the thum to your the pretty red patterns form on the cieling.

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