My new hobby.

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by 2_deck_dash, Feb 3, 2010.

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  1. We can take it in turns. It's not fair for me to have all the fun. :lol:
  2. If you want i'll distract the girls for you. They wouldn't suspect a girl to be involved! :D
  3. Er if your a girl, I have just had a disgusting idea as to where the throw material could come from. :oops: :oops: :wink: :D
  4. Bet the fooking victims are glad he hasn't got a pet elephant, he's welcome to come round to my cottage and wank my dog and cats saves me a chore :D
  5. Promise me (no sh1t jack) their virgins and we do oral :roll: :wink: :D

    I once asked a bird in the states if she did oral sex and she said "why talk about it"? :roll: 8O
  6. Blackrat

    Blackrat War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    Animal semen? How odd. One presumes that he has been wanking off the animals himself? I have to admit, i find this whole thing amusing. As a young 14 year old female with an attitude, try explaining to your parents that you have "No idea how it got there or what it is".
  7. Why do I find this story amusing? Is there something wrong with me???!!!
  8. Blackrat

    Blackrat War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    Not at all. The more i think about this the more it makes me chuckle. 2DD was quite right to bring this to our attention. I salute him.
  9. :D It's like a Benny Hill sketch. :Cue funny music: Benny sneaks up on a young girl at a bus stop in speeded-up motion, dressed in beret and dirty mac. Pulls a syringe of monkey spunk from the inside pocket of his mac, grins to camera. Cut to syringe as Benny carefully squirts spunk onto unsuspecting girl. Cut back to Benny, grinning inanely to camera, who then runs off into the distance. Cut back to girl who reaches down to her leg to feel wetness, recoils with horror as she brings it to her nose, then looks around puzzled as to what has happened. And then slaps innocent man stood in front of her in the bus queue. Cut back to Benny, hiding in a bush, giggling to himself. Benny winks to camera. Fade.

    Piss funny :lol:
  10. A quick update:

    Last night I snuck into the farmyard part of London zoo looking for a suitable creature from which to procure some jizz. I spotted a pretty good looking ram and decided to give him a go. It took me a while to catch him because he kept running around in circles and was making loads of noise but eventually I managed to wrestle him to the ground and started to gently wank him off. After about 10 minutes of wrestling he started to buck and shot his load into my hand.

    Armed with a palm full of ram jittler I set off to find a victim. As I walked through Regents Park, I noticed a young lady, probably about 20 years old. She was alone, not too shabby and looking well up for a face slap of spunk.

    I snuck up behind her with my cupped palm and launched the splunge all over the left side of her face. As I released the load I shouted: ''Go Web!'' Just to add to the effect of the strands of love juice splattering across her pretty little grid.

    I ran away in delight as she stood in the street crying, while the thought of what was sliding down her face slowly dawned on her.

    Good times, Spidermanning rocks.

    Go Web!
  11. Blackrat

    Blackrat War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    Indeed it does. It is the sport of Kings and winners.
  12. And Spiderman
  13. 2DD you fcukin bastard.
    Last night as I was Innocently walking around the ram enclosure in London zoo dressed in my goatskin coat (so as not to distress the girls, I mean goats :oops: ) some cnut grabs me wrestles me to the ground and starts pulling me plonker. Well I did struggle but I am of course frail.
    When I shot my cocoa the bastard runs away with my jizz in his hand shouting "Go web" or something.
    Distressed Tamworth.

    Edited to say I might just be innocently there again tonight say around nine? :oops: :wink: :D
  14. I have a new hero (now that Shipman has gone). What a quality nutter; he has it all in one twisted fetish- grinding on kids, throwing spunk and wanking-off animals. I'll write to him in prison, and even send a little hamster jizz smuggled into nick (concealed in the spine of Orwell's 'Animal Farm').
  15. There i was in Regents Park in my best drag looking for a bit of trade from the Household Division, when some twat covers me in jizz.
  16. I would be a willing participant in this sport and if anyone would like to join in I have a plan.

    I will shortly be visiting west midlands safari park and I plan to gather as much ammunition as possible to enable me to go on “webbing†session. I may start with waking a rhino off, that would keep us going for a while. For the danger side of the sport I may approach a lion. We could then run riot and “web†unsuspecting targets (below is what we would be like).

  17. Good idea, count me in.

    I like the way they have remembered to bring a camera. Presumably for those Kodak moments when the victims burst into tears.
  18. HA! Cop hot spunk slut!

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