Medical Breakthrough - New Cure for Somnambulism

Discussion in 'Current Affairs' started by Scran_Bag, Oct 7, 2006.

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  1. The Bejing Express & Star announced an amazing new medical break-through yesterday.
    "Somnambulism can be cured by amputation" said Dr. Fly Yin Ax of the Shanghai Institute for Radical Surgery.

    Is this drastic procedure just what the sleep-walking community have been waiting for or is it just yet another revenue raising ruse by the Chinese spare body parts regime?

    What are your views?
  2. Surely the simplest cure is to lash them in their pit.
  3. I think that might just provoke a severe rebuke from the P.C. community regarding over excessive use of restraints.
  4. What bit do they amputate? The head?
  5. I didn't know bondage was un-PC?

    Decapitation is infact an ancient cure for insomnia having been used in China since the times of Fuk Gan Bang, King of Chai Fook (now Nanking). Whilst it is efficacious it has the downside of being very messy in terms of the blood liberated. Unless you have red furnsihings, it will just ruin your decor!

    A better method was deviced by Admiral von Pusser, which is a pint of rum just before bedtime plus a Chief to read you gentle bedtime stories, such as ? ??...
  6. a pair of bedsocks with drwaing pins in them worn in bed is a better solution.You can then video them doing sily dances and put them on site and vote for the best!

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