Me and Brown Hatters

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by stan_the_man, Sep 23, 2012.

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  1. In my younger days I would like to think I was quite a good looking young man this inevitably led to the occasional encouter with those who swing with a different bat. The first encounter was on Glasgow Central waiting for a train the Helensborough heading back to the Cherry B when I needed to take a piss. I got my little todger out an low and behold some skinny 40 something hatter starts giving me the wink and I fcuking shit myself twat only follows me all over the station till I jump on the train that was me at 16 jump forward a year at 17 in Guzz I was much more worldly wise Me and my mate Arthur Atherton would go to Cascades or Commadores flirt with the noshers and get free wets all night.

    Fast forward HMS Bristol 1979 in Norfolk Virginia USA went to the Enlisted Mens bar on a mess run severely shitfaced and somehow lost the lads after going for a piss no taxis so decide to hitch to the club were were heading for. After about 10 minutes some guy pulls up in a Camero and offers me a lift 2 minutes into the journey he pulls out a gun and says unless you blow me I'm going to pull the trigger, fcuk me I shat myself and thought what do I do - we pull up at some traffic lights I open the door and do some serious billy big steps only to watch him get out and start chasing me. I run accross the road into the Maccy Ds car park and look around and started trying to find somewhere to hide tried a couple of car doors until I found one open and jumped behind the front seats into the back seats, full of pizza boxes and Maccy D boxes I hunker down shaking like a shitting dog I see the guy still looking for me a couple of minutes later the car owner and his mate get in start the car and drive off after a couple of minutes I realise I;m safe and pop my head up fcuk me they nearly crashed the car. Turns out both US matelots off the USS Virginia and pissed themselves when I told them what had happened invited them round for a DTS on Bristol -they saved my life.
  2. If we ever meet up for a pint Stan, I'll be bringing a baseball bat.
  3. Its bad enough poor old Stan getting chased around fuckin Virginia, having survived that you wanna poleaxe him for a shag, dirty bastard, leave him alone.
  4. The baseball bat is for inserting into Stan's "friends" orifices, breaking them in for you in a sense :)

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