May I vote myself as c*ck of the year??

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by stan_the_man, Feb 1, 2010.

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  1. As I lay in my scratcher last night after my little altercation with SPB I came to realise what an utter complete penis I have become since I left. I think SPB was quite right when he said I had become a sad old bitter tw*t and a shadow of the guy I was and I would like to think that those of you who did know me when I was serving thought I was an ok bloke.

    I think for many of us leaving the services after so many years takes time and in my defence I don't think I have made the transition easily.
    Apologies to all concerned and no more rants from me. Maybe I should go back on the piss it makes me far more mellow but then I'd have to stop taking the tablets.
  2. If you laying in bed agonising over pretend arguments on the internet may I suggest a one way trip to the potting shed with a gas cooker, some secatuers and 150 Valium ?

    Cheer up, its not real you know
  3. Blackrat

    Blackrat War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    Alright there Reni. Good to see you with your proper username and not that spanish nonsense over the road.
  4. May I vote myself as c*ck of the year??

    OK Stan, you silly old bounder, where do we all cast our votes?

    Seriously, I'm sure SPB etc will have all ripped out the odd page from their little black books before now, so we'll just have to put it down to a bad night on the keys.

    Submariners & Reggies? There are some that I am less than friendly with, too, (but don't dare tell them that I told you.)

    Bob :thumbright:

    PS On a lighter note - How is your daughter progressing with her Naval career?
  5. Blackrat

    Blackrat War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    Oh shush you old fart. We can all be tools and anyway, tis only t'internet.
  6. sgtpepperband

    sgtpepperband War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    Apology accepted, and no offence taken... :thumbleft:
  7. You are an old ex-matelot and like most of them you probably emit a faint but constant odour of stale urine. This wouldn't be particularly bad but you also live in Crafthole which if not the arsehole of England is certainly an arms-length up it. I know the area well and you are also surrounded by neighbours who are the type of people who masturbate at weddings and most of them are on drugs and welfare.

    Your various posts suggest to me that you have a certain duality in your character, or put simply you are a borderline neurotic schizophrenic.

    If this is the case you can not only vote for yourself as Cock of the Week but also vote against yourself at the same time.

    You probably just need cheeering up a little and hopefully my post will be a nudge in that direction.

  8. Ninja_Stoker

    Ninja_Stoker War Hero Moderator

    Where's the voting button, Stan? :wink:
  9. I know it's just tinternet but fcuk me I can be so anal these days, SPB thanks for that mate felt such a tw*t all day. Ninja also a fcuking disaster with cut and paste and shit I'll take your vote as a yes:D
    Bergen too many days at the Fort I suspect :D
    Ta lads fcuk me but I miss it and I'm so jealous of you lucky b*stards that are still in, my daughter joins ARK at the end of the month fooking spooky - my last ship
  10. Good to have you back Stan :thumbleft:
  11. And good to have you back as well Stan :thumbleft:
  12. Bergen Ta mate been wallowing in self pity all day, could be worse though Argyle might just stay up
  13. Ninja_Stoker

    Ninja_Stoker War Hero Moderator

    Thank goodness he hasn't gone tri-polar or Bergen would be spamming the thread for yonks.
  14. Tri wot?? do I need the dentist as well as the shrink then doh I read molar instead of polar cnut that I am - see I can be contrite
  15. witsend

    witsend War Hero Book Reviewer

    I'm sure I can hear Mike Reid's "my story" tune kicking in. :wink:
  16. Pedant mode on " Thar was Simon Bates and I couldn't stand that part of his programme, weak willed whinging maggots writing in with their pathetic sob stories" Pedant mode off, rant off....and relax
  17. witsend

    witsend War Hero Book Reviewer

    And so it was, thanks mate. I never use to mind it very much, it always made me feel better about how things were going for me.
  18. Yeah I know eating ones shit isn't nice still humility isn't too bad a vice
  19. Stan me old bucket of monkey spunk, there have been times in the past that I have thought you a complete twat. 8O
    Actually I still do, and probably will tomorrow.
    As a Honky you can't help it so I do not hold it against you.
    That said most of you white bastards are sh1t lickin dribblers so your normal, and as I like you I wont get offensive. :wink: :D
  20. Fooking el RR I am so touched that my act of contrition has been so gratefuly received I am humbled by your response that it actually made me weep.

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