Management Lesson

Discussion in 'Nautical Jokes' started by Ager50, Jan 5, 2011.

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  1. The Two Minute Management Lesson

    Lesson One

    An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw
    the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing?" The
    eagle answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below
    the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the
    rabbit and ate

    Management Lesson - To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting
    very, very high up.

    Lesson Two

    A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the
    top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy."
    "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull.
    "They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and
    found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of
    the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the
    second branch. Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly
    perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who
    shot him out of the tree.

    Management Lesson - Bull shit might get you to the top, but it won't keep
    you there.

    Lesson Three

    A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird
    froze and fell to the ground in a large pasture. While he was lying
    there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay
    there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The
    dung was actually
    thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing
    for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate.
    Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow
    dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.

    Management Lesson -
    (1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.
    (2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
    (3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!

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