Matelots, Booties and Pongos just can't keep the chap stored away can they? Over the years, I have noticed (and been guilty of it myself) that we all like unleashing the bedroom boatrope as often as possible. Now we all like to get naked, however; If the social occasion precludes full nakedness, then just waving the two-wheeled porridge cannon will suffice. Occasions when I have nearly died with laughter at the exposure of cocks and bollocks: Closed up on the bridge at night; the QM, Comms monkey and I spend the entire watch milling around with our genitalia hanging out of our eights. As it is pitch black, no-one can tell. Whilst delivering a casex brief, I scan the room and note my oppo standing just to the left of a seated female PWO with his chopper mere centimetres from her ear, smiling like a rapist. How I finished that brief is beyond me. A full Air team all with chaps out during an Adex. During rounds on OM1s course, whilst chatting to the Officer of the Day, once again an oppo is stroking his manhood in the distance whilst I try to converse without crying. Every ships company photo ever, someone will have it out. On the gangway. During lectures; especially effective when you grab your mates hand and make him touch it. Every single time you sit in the mess with your back to anyone who has been drinking, if you look up after a tap on the shoulder you can guarantee cock-to-face. Anyone have any chap-out dits?