Is this Heaven

Discussion in 'Diamond Lil's' started by slim, Oct 22, 2014.

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  1. Is this Heaven
    Heaven means different things to different people.
    So perhaps we can come up with a few examples.

    The Matelot
    The bars never shut.
    You are never on watch.
    Happy hour lasts all day.
    All the lady sailors are Divs
    There are No divisions or Kit Musters.
    Officers never piss you off.
    Shit on a raft is available for breakfast and babies heads for lunch.
    You always trap
    She always says yes
    You never get a blobby knob.

    The Poofter
    All matelots are gay
    All bums are available
    All wrists are Limp
    Everyone minces.
    Everyone speaks with a lisp.
    The gay bars have pretty drinks
    You can cruise anywhere
    Public toilets have peepholes already drilled.
    The police are all gay.
    You always trap.

    The Lesbian
    All matelots are female
    All matelots are lezzers.
    Your vibrator batteries never run out.
    There are lots of trains and buses to drive.
    It smells like a fish market.
    The male clothing fits properly
    Mr Dyson designs the vibrators
    You always trap.


    So lets see what heaven is like for others
    Feel free to enlighten us.
     

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