Introduction...

Discussion in 'Joining Up - Royal Navy Recruiting' started by r_s_l, Mar 3, 2008.

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  1. Ahoy there! As you will gather from my disgracefully sproggy post count, I am new here. That's not the worst of it though - not only did I used to be a pongo but I've also got a cracking set of man boobs from too many hob-nobs and not enough sit-ups. Apart from that, I have a serious fetish for emos, feet and guiness, once believed that there was such a disease as 'sticky cancer' and once got banned from a pub (in Chatham of all places) for being the worst karaoke singer ever. Oh - and my favourite animal is the herpes virus.

    I served with matelots in the Falklands in 1996 and found myself jealous of their sidies and then in Iraq, where I hung out with a couple of Jack Dusties for six months - one a virtual mute (albeit with a great arse) and the other a lesbian. I had no idea what they were talking about most of the time but consolled myself with the fact that I knew al the lyrics to 'Gosport Nancy' whilst they had never heard of it...

    Anyway, I'm bored on civvie strasse and am a right billy-no-mates (I basically sit at home and go on the piss with my gold fish). So I'm looking to join either the RN or the RFA before I become a serial killer or sex offender. For forms sake I'll insert a bone question here about whether you need to take an iron to Raleigh...

    It's nice to meet you all. I would never eat omlettes.
     
  2. :laughing6: Good first post Percy!!

    I however do like omelettes. But the food to avoid is quiche - real men don't eat quiche. Fact.

    And you were right to be jealous of our sidies...aren't they fab? :thumright: :dwarf:
     
  3. sgtpepperband

    sgtpepperband War Hero Moderator Book Reviewer

    Damn right. We eat flan. Or flange. Whichever is closer. Or not smelling of rotten eggs... :pukel: 8O
     
  4. Ahhhh, the golden question!
     
  5. Can Jack be a lesbian now? o_O

    I eat quiche! :) :lick:
     
  6. It is NOT bloody quiche...it is egg and bacon pie FFS. :rendeer: :rendeer:
     
  7. Of all the stuff to get your teeth into, you choose a throw-away comment about omlettes! If you must know, I've been off them ever since a swiss girl I was shagging in Israel farted in my face during cunnilingus. Even now I find it hard to sleep when I think about it...

    So - what's the best seafaring career move for a travel-mad, gay alcoholic then?
     
  8. Ninja_Stoker

    Ninja_Stoker War Hero Moderator

    I hear the Swiss Navy deploy to Israel soon...
     
  9. Alternatively these people seem to be eager to get some fresh blood aboard
    http://www.gaysailing.org.uk/
    They probably like a tipple or two as well, so you're quids in.
    NZB
     
  10. wet_blobby

    wet_blobby War Hero Moderator

    Since they got rid of the Royal Yach..yatch...fcuked if I can spell it.....but you know what I'm talking about........I suspect the choice is limited.
     
  11. Oh well, the RFA it is then!
     

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